Code Blue Memes

if we’re ever doing medication calculations in our heads just know i’m pretending and it’s all on you to keep the patient alive

First they came for my Tylenol and I did not speak out Because I was already autistic Then they came for my Zoloft and I did not speak out Because I couldn’t afford the deductible anyway But then they came for my Taco Bell - and there were no poor autistic people left to speak for me

Conservatives: “mental illness is to blame for mass shootings” Conservatives: *bans SSRI’s*

honestly couldn’t be a better time to get sucked into a jet engine

if RFK bans my SSRI’s i won’t tell anyone but there would be signs

can we all just agree to say the next vaccine is for horses so we can get this shit over with a little faster please

on the bright side, the joint commission won’t be stopping by for a while 😌

It worked so well for Covid, it’s gotta work for Hantavirus lol. Fucking grifters

a brown recluse bit Kyle Rittenhouse on national nurses day

could’ve solved a lot of problems if we just made the hantavirus cruise ship go through the strait of hormuz, but ya’ll ain’t ready for that conversation

“you’re so easy to talk to” yeah i’m filling in the 37 hospital required patient questionnaires in my triage note

everything is urgent at the urgent care clinic except employee health benefits and salary raises

jokes on you, we’ve had hantavirus chillin in the nurses break room since 9/11 and it’s the only thing keeping the microwave door handle from falling off

clown school graduation ceremony being held at the college of chiropractic

me starting my first job in nursing vs me a year later

yeah sex is cool but have you ever been fully staffed

me flicking through hospital policies when the joint commission asks how long the glucometer testing fluid is good for knowing damn well the answer ain’t in there

can we do a Spirit Airlines to HCA?

me watching my triage patient with abdominal pain wash down a bag of flamin hots with a lemonade