Cory

She asked what time I was born. On to the next one

Gas prices are at crazy levels--fire Obama!

If you’re expecting a Star Wars joke from me on May the Fourth then you’re looking in alderaan places

cows standing in rain again. brain cells optional i guess

ugly asf i’m crying

I’m on the side of twitter where animals are trolling themselves

touching the electric fence just to feel something again

If it's possible to feel embarrassment while one is alone, that's how I felt staring at this map for several minutes and trying to find all seven missing contiguous American states Crikey that was painful

🚨#BREAKING: Spirit Airlines are now expected to cease all operations around 3:00 a.m. ET on Saturday

sophisticated people like all three

Chris Paul you can now rest

fuck you

I'm used to watching an ugly product from a Cleveland sports team on Sunday at 1 p.m. Usually it's just a different sport.

Two things I learned coming to DC as often as I have this past few months. 1. It has some absolutely amazing rooftop bars and restaurants. 2. Googling “rooftops in DC” will get you on some lists you don’t want to be on.

what i’ve learned from this is that we do not dust the foul poles

All-timer snapchat post man

Violent psycho-bitch tornado just west of Braman, OK, intercepted in the Dominator 3

Undersized offensive lineman Browns back at it

@rawsalerts Bro bet on himself

🤩 Cleveland supporting Cleveland. Any time, any place. @CleGuardians | #LetEmKnow

Nation Excitedly Gathers For Annual Tradition Of Seeing Whose Career Will Be Killed By Cleveland Browns buff.ly/w3Bd3Ng