Carl Littlejohns 🦕

@dave43law That, Dave, was THEN. #USAalone

MAGA are as thick as hippo poo Argentina invaded the Falklands - the UK went to protect out territory

@AvonandsomerRob They are cheap and feature rich. The only question is what will they be like in 3 years

I'm seeing more Chinese EVs on British roads than any other 26 plate vehicles. Are they any good?

@lewis_goodall It was a bit surprising.

Trump says the Japanese “know about surprise” given Pearl Harbor, with the Japanese PM sat next to him.

@GordonGekko damn, I blinked and missed it

Bitcoin is going PARABOLIC just as I said it would. If you have been paying attention you have been catching these moves with me PERFECTLY. The leg to $80,000 will leave many sidelined and seething. Are you connecting the dots?

@KayBurley WHY didn't she quip "Didn't end so well though, did it?"

Or the most offensive diplomatic gaffe in post war US/Japan history. You decide…

@theeobservist @PolitlcsUK View DJT as a spoiled five year old and it all makes complete sense.

@PolitlcsUK Interesting considering Trump recently said the US doesn’t need the UK’s help. Yet here we are discussing joint action over Hormuz. It’s almost as if “we don’t need the UK’s help” sounds good in speeches but doesn’t work so well when global trade routes start closing.

🚨 BREAKING: Keir Starmer has just spoken to Donald Trump No 10: "The leaders discussed the ongoing situation in the Middle East and the importance of reopening the Strait of Hormuz to end the disruption to global shipping, which is driving up costs worldwide. "The Prime Minister also expressed his condolences for the American service personnel who have lost their lives during the conflict. They agreed to keep in touch"

@jonsopel @doctorshaib Thats basically how Germany was treated after WW1. That went well.

A week ago it was about regime change and the Iranian people taking back their country. This weekend there had to be total surrender. Now the war is just a ‘short term excursion’ and the war is nearly done. But there is no regime change. There is no surrender. 🤷🏻‍♂️

@bushontheradio If she is in a party of sensibles, she'll be fine. 16 is a bit young to be there on her own in my view unless she is a very mature 16y old. Ive heard such conversations in adjacent tents at Reading....

So my 16 year old wants to go to the Reading Festival - would it be ok for me to go but in deep cover so I can keep an eye on her?

@nondualrandy Friendship is money

Finally figured it out. Fiat isn't money. Gold isn't money. Bitcoin isn't money. Assets arent money. Energy is money.

@MartinSLewis @LaraLewington "Critical ignoring" is a thing. New to me, but a bit like the "Streisand effect" ? vis :BBC News - How the 'red v blue school wars' exposed the social media gap between children and parents - BBC News bbc.co.uk/news/articles/…

If I'd thought the ****ing scammers couldn't sink any lower - now they have now done deep fake ads with a supposed video of my wife @LaraLewington being beaten up by an 'immigrant' as he was refused entry to 'Martin Lewis' Quantum AI' investment scheme as it isn't for 'outsiders'. We've had worried messages from friends. Social media firms have no problem taking money to publish this offensive, fake, organised criminals attempts to rip people off! Clearly if you see these please report them. Yet I have no faith in any of these firms to clear up this crap as they're earning too much. And the implementation of the scam ads rules in the Online Safety Act keep being delayed and delayed.

Have you incorporated "critical ignoring" yet? BBC News - How the 'red v blue school wars' exposed the social media gap between children and parents - BBC News bbc.co.uk/news/articles/…

@lady_valor_07 Dont worry about what you say. Worry about how you make other people feel.

I’m 25. Give me oddly specific life tips. No general ”surround yourself with positive people” tips. I want the most random, specific advice possible.

@lady_valor_07 Think.

People who grew up without smartphones. What did you do when you were bored???

@THERussellGrant hope it's sorted soon.

The continuing saga of my tooth continues on. Some of you may know since my brain tumour op I’ve had problems with my teeth and gums. Since I’ve had root canal treatment I have had 4 abscesses in 14 months. I wanted it extracted but no-one will do it due to my meds as a result of having no pituitary. So I’ve taken advice and tomorrow I’m off to see a root canal specialist for retreatment. If he can help then wonderful if not it’s into hospital with sedation. Wish me luck! 🍀

@anon_opin It's the cracks that let the light in.

The song "Hallelujah" by Leonard Cohen (popularised by Jeff Buckley) in about sex, specifically orgasm. It is NOT about god or religion. It is hilarious when church-goers sing it and disturbing when children sing it.

@Whale_Guru Isnt insider dealing illegal

@LucyChalice yewww

@Iamivy05 And then you were pushed aside by a first-aider?

one of my fears happened today. they called for a doctor as we were boarding the plane. so i run down the jet bridge. agent: mam you can’t come in here. me: they called for a doctor different agent: are you a nurse? me: no, i’m a doctor agent: a medical doctor? me: 😑 YES, a family medicine doctor. i've been to medical school, did 3 years of residency, a year of fellowship, practicing for the past 6 years, and i'm board certified. i'm more qualified than the surgeon general. 💅🏼

@shahh He also needs the $ to crash as the insane debt he is sitting on, is in dollars. Only real estate (assets) will survive. He'll be fine.

Trump is playing 3d chess. The plan is simple. OIL → $200. This will knock Crypto and Stocks down 40%. Send gas prices to $10. Cut Real Estate in half. And while everyone is panicking, we get generational entries. Then he ends the war, we begin the greatest bull market in history, and he takes credit for all of it. Trust the process.

@LayahHeilpern damned if he follows DJT, damned if he doesn't

Keir Starmer doesn’t want Trump to use the two aircraft carriers for involvement in the Iran war. But I bet if Trump said don’t worry we’re using it to bring a load of migrants over and house them, he’d be on board in a heartbeat. Pathetic weak leadership from Britain.