nomnomsequitur

"You see Lainy, this is all we need. A couple smokes, a cup of coffee, and a little bit of conversation. You and me and five bucks."

@Sportsnet650 @JamieDodd *THAN

Do you agree with @JamieDodd?

We didn't hire enough etsy witches my wife said

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?! #CANUCKS

When I die, please cover my casket in my sticker collection that I bought but could never commit to applying on things

STOP!!! YOU'RE MAKING ME NERVOUS! 🤮🤮🤮

broke down in tears at the parfait parlor in shinjuku because for a brief moment i got to feel like a japanese teenage girl instead of a balding fat middle aged man

@JustSarahG @MyHanabishi @hana_beshie 40 years old ka na pala?

Happy 40th year @MyHanabishi! Proud to be a part of the family!

@shawnyao "leche, nandiyan na naman yung mga pun¥*tang hipag."

@shawnyao Mga HPG (i call them hipag) na walang kwenta. Drivers should stop giving them the right of way, tbh.

Pardon my French. There’s no traffic, so what’s the point of all the near side swiping and noise?! A$$wipe.

Cheech, Shorty and Murph. Forever teammates. 💙 John Shorthouse and @sportsnetmurph pay tribute to John Garrett on Hockey Central 🕊️

when I was a kid i used to think this was the best pop song ever made. then i grew up and matured and realised that this is absolutely the best pop song ever made

Thank you for everything, John Garrett 💙💚 @SNJohnGarrett | @Canucks

Who did it better than these rockstars? (Nobody!).

💔😭🌭🍔 #cheech

@riotsurvivor Young divorcee all the way #artyparty

as a canucks fan who are you bandwagoning

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

@WhitecapsFC Wouldn't it be wild if @VancityReynolds, @Sethrogen, and @MichaelBuble saved the @WhitecapsFC from leaving the city? Oooh, the Apple TV/HULU documentary series about this will be totally fire #VWFC #savethecaps

Vancouver Whitecaps FC has issued the following official statement: whitecapsfc.com/news/april-clu… #VWFC

My version of the next great Canucks front office. PoHo - Shane Doan GM - Sam Ventura AGM - Judd Brackett Lets make it happen.

i’m replaying this and giggling like a baby watching cocomelon