bong water tea

I'm going on a special diet where I can only eat ass n pussy

Sometimes she gives me attention when I have breakdowns over the internet so uh.. My god I'm so sad I might kill myself.... 👀👀

Not my bisexual ass checking out the muscle daddy at the strip club. Why is he the hottest thing in a building full of half naked women.

Well, it's 7am and I can but alcohol again. Do you think they'll sell it to me if I'm clearly still drunk and have been crying for 2 hours?

For women.........

I had a very rough day and I deserve head scratches while being little spoon.

I'm so bad at drumming. My right arm wants to copy everything my right foot does so I'm literally just practicing 1/8 notes with my foot and 1/4 notes with my arm.

Happy tax evasion day. Tax gain harvesting is a tax loophole for poor people like me.

In my dream last night, one of my family members said, "He looks so much like a girl now!" which I know for a fact is a phrase I will hear from them at least once.

@lupineangel It was quite a relief, honestly. I can just go about my day most of the time. Although my lack of ability to get it up on command is causing my dick to shrink, rendering me completely useless as a top lol

@disposableidiot that whole sex drive thing never happened to me , and i just wanna jork it somewhere i can actually relax ...

yeah the nic withdrawal sucks but what really sucks is the touching myself withdrawal.

@lupineangel Yeah, visiting family sucked before I nuked my sex drive with estrogen.

i NEED to go home and jack off...

We're not gonna make it are we? Humans, I mean.

red 40 could fix me

@AshySlasheeDB Easy. Joker 🙄

Mark Hamill. What comes to mind?

Being the bull is fun until the queen ignores your calls. That's when you realize you're the real cuck.

@arkangeljoy Men wish they looked like that.

They’re already saying “man body” like bro just say you’ve never taken a woman’s clothes off

@pierbiwierbi There are plenty of bitches out there with a pussy. We needed more variety.

cant believe i got nerfed from spawn like could u imagine me with a pussy. id be so op

@pierbiwierbi @SSSmallTea Gods bless both of you.

@SSSmallTea fr i suddenly go through years of voice training when i sit on a cock

trans women who don’t voice train(me) sound girly when it really matters(bouncing on it till i cant walk)

If I were aromantic, I would be so much more productive and wealthy.

A dude I know that owes me hundreds of dollars just gave me an $11 tip through doordash. Should I count that against his debt?

Found a "whip-it!" under my teen's bed. He says he got it in Bible class and it's a reminder of Jesus getting whipped for our sins. I love my God-fearing son. #whipit #godisgood