Jesse Eisemann

Wearing the shirt of the band you're going to see

I got laid off in October, which isn't your fault but it IS your problem, because I started an Etsy shop with my gf and you're all gonna hear about it. Here's a goofy D&D ornament I'm excited to share: The 12-Sided Dice of Christmas etsy.com/listing/441866…

goatse

Weird way to find out my dad is circumcised

Your parents: "we turned your childhood bedroom into a home office" My parents:

And what of our uncling? Are we to toil in endless drudgery?

Kiss your storage woes behind

You have my attention…

Mom says it’s your turn to spin the Dinner Wheel

Guards!! Seize him!!

Made a long as hell video about outrage creators, mugshot t-shirts, and Italian gay bars that I think is important! tiktok.com/t/ZT82fxNn8/

Can I say something without everyone getting mad

Andrés is a sharp, quick-witted comedy writer, a skilled designer who can make a piece of Art that stands out among a sea of Content, and an entire joy to collaborate with!

The means of production are safe with me, sir 🫡 I wouldn’t even know what to do with them 🤪

Instead of paying for health insurance we should be allowed to write really nice thank you cards to doctors when they do a good job

@colbydroscher Can we focus on the real issue please

Been a while since I’ve looked at a quarter. When did my man get a dick ponytail?

This is extremely disappointing

You can double your Kyle in 14 years if you’re smart about it. You’d be crazy not to