eric bernal

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eric bernal

eric bernal

@ericbcomedy

Phoenix comedian by ways of NY . Here to talk shit and sometimes be a sensitive lil bih

Katılım Mayıs 2020
211 Takip Edilen167 Takipçiler
eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
Drake got me wanting to meet a girl named Janice just so I can tell her to STFU
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
If you’re a comedian and found any of the jokes on the Roast of Kevin Hart offensive …. Ur Gaaayyyyyy
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
In Scottsdale, your Eskimo brother count could qualify you for season tickets
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
All year it’s “f*ck dem kids” and today it’s Happy Mother’s Day
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
“The Roast of Kevin Hart” should be promoted as a watch party somewhere this Sunday
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
Watching people drag others on the Internet is so lame.
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
Chipotle has horrible straws
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
If you text with your keyboard clicks on. Who is that for? Are you OK? Because I’m trying to enjoy this silence and I can’t with you sounding like you’re sending Morse code from a hostage situation
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
More like Hillary ouuuff 🫠
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
California has Coachella Arizona has Blowchella ❄️
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
Pro Tip: Date her after the RED Hair phase
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
Don’t ever judge me by the things that I like on Instagram. I’ve once liked a post that said “guys named Eric ain’t sh%%” I just be thumbing hard
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
If he live with his mom or she drive an Altima , I ain’t trying to listen to your heart break about breaking up with them. You knew
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
Pro Tip: If you ask her out to dinner and her reply isnt yes or no … but it’s “where?” Leave that alone. Her company can be purchased if certain restaurants dictate a yes or no.
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
“Why does it get so hot here!?” ME: were you aware that Arizona is a fu%#n DESERT 🏜️? (YFDA)
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
Why they release the Justin Timberlake body cam of his DUI ? Hasn’t this country done enough to our black entertainment
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
“I looked into your cup to see if you had enough You looked into mine to see if I had more than you … That’s the difference”
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
Haven’t been able to sleep. Keep waking up into sleep paralysis with a feeling of female entity kind of laying next to me while laughing in my ear. Just woke up and said “what do you want!?” And she tells me she sees more as a friend. Can’t even get demon entities
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
Grief is weird. Some days you’re laughing with friends… and then a random song reminds you someone you love isn’t here to hear it.
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eric bernal
eric bernal@ericbcomedy·
Healing isn’t pretty. But neither is staying broken
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