The Stabbin’ Dad

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The Stabbin’ Dad

The Stabbin’ Dad

@excusemeson

Let’s take this city to the knife store

Stabbing Village Katılım Haziran 2012
582 Takip Edilen93 Takipçiler
The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
a bell tower strikes in the distance as the knife enters my balls
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
Drank above twenty beers this night at the tavern, strong ale flowing free. Came home mighty hot and stiff, so did tug my shit in bed till spent, groaning like a beast.
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
my son’s least favorite part of the evening is the “mothman moment.” but it’s over somewhat quickly
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
(My first day streaming as TheEducatedRacist) I dare say I detest the Moorish gentleman.
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
briefly getting a distinct aged cheese smell from my ass and digging around in there with a confused look on my face until it smells like shit again
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
my son lives in a fantasy land that begins and ends with his ass, whereas my fantasy land is concerned exclusively with my balls
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
I cast engorgio on my dick. It fails. My wand explodes and kills me
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
getting an awesome blowjob from my grandfather
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
teaching the family dog to pleasure me orally for milk bones but feeling ashamed of how unenthusiastic and transactional he seems about the whole thing
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
keep telling my son in the movie trailer voice that this summer we’re both taking a trip to benghazi to “settle the score”
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
my adopted black son is fucking my wife
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
quitting my job to pursue my life’s dream of training a beer sniffing dog and eventually being abandoned by my family
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
great news son, I’ve been up all night huffing gas and now you’re going to hear some of my opinions
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
they are lowering me into a barbecue pit and covering my dick and balls with foil so they stay moist
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
you have an incredible rack but you should probably wear a bra around your son
Aaron Reitz@aaron_reitz

Ten-mile Good Friday pilgrimage for the Reitz boys from the Cathedral of the Diocese of Austin to the Schoenstatt Shrine. On Good Friday, Jesus Christ was falsely accused by His own people, tossed back and forth between corrupt government and religious officials, sentenced to death, beaten beyond recognition, nailed to a cross, and died an excruciating death. Why? To pay for our sins and provide the sacrifice necessary to repair the fractured relationship we’d have with our Creator.

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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
the anti fungal cream healed my balls but now i find myself missing the smell, son. do you remember the smell
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The Stabbin’ Dad
The Stabbin’ Dad@excusemeson·
they’re calling it sex breakfast, son. and it’s an unexpected twist on the ordinary breakfast you thought you knew
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