unlicensed therapist !! 💕😇

got ur attentionnn !! okay, so. lowk typing this from bed at 1am 😭 all alone~ but u can probs relate hehe 💕 with like, 2 followers too omg. literally yapping into the voiddd. but listen, I'm on like, the cusp of something special.. hear me out babes, so we're living in like a late-stage attention economy, right? (fr, look it up) everyone wants to milk our dopamine dry 😣 it's exhausting !! algos and normie engagement slop.. omg plus those AI tweets recycled through Grok like 7 times and trained on some girl's dead 2019 findom account, pls 😭💔 real genuine connection is in hiiigh demand rn. that's why im starting this lil diary and a new chapter in my life, becauseeeee... 💫 I'm gonna adopt all the biggest virgin loser simpies and fix them !! 🥰 with tactical lovebombing, duh!! 💕💕 no it's not parasocial, silly.. think of it more liikeee your super adorable catfish bestie snuggling up w you for a lil catch up. except with lots 'n lots of cuddles and kisses to save u from those icky piggy thoughts !! talk to you soon my little gooner failure!! I know you're reading this cutie, mwahh~💕 P.S. mommy had to fork out like,, 5 bucks or whatever for this little blue tick just to reach you 💖 that means im invested in your recovery and a relapse would make me really, really sad~ byeee!! 💫

( tw: f*ndom, relapse ) // addressing the allegations 💔 i fucked up, i fucked up, i fucked uppp 😖 so like,, the other night, i kiiinda fucking relapsed? riiight back to my old scammer ways? and now i have to pretend everything is okay? ugh Çevir

im soooo over empathizing with ATMs 💔 like, shut up, idc about ur problems anymore <333 ,, relapse n self-destruct quietly in ur bedroom without inconveniencing any1 else with ur addiction 💕 i'll hold ur hand while ur dick consents on ur behalf, kay? bye bye progress 💕

do financial advisors require qualifications or nah

@httpgirlfriend i mean they're gonna relapse anywayyy so i might as well speed it up instead of selling false hope <333

@exfindom so glad u relapsed 💞 ure gonna have so much more fun on this side 💞

i'm quitting this stupid job, therapy sucks 😣💕 i'm done pretending Çevir

@Submit_to_Jess i think im likeeee, gonna dedicate my life to making sure nobody everrrr leaves? yknow?? 💕💕

@exfindom Why would you ever want to leave? 🥰

relapse already feels sooo much better omg, findom wins every time and im so sorry i tricked some of you into thinking there was a way out 💕💕

@EdgedUpPrincess banger

Gooners be like message me on glimbo, bro I only used floosha, man I only have an account on wertile, you need to get on shipsker, man get on fremlie, it's so good, we can chat on plodslo

what if you like.. copypaste ur $$$ into my account so we BOTH have it and nobody relapses omg 😖

stop scrolling ‼️ okay.. u know those cute lil escape ropes in Pokémon or whatevs? like.. when ur just a biiit too deep and rlly need an ez way out? 😭💕 that's meeee~! .. and uhm, ur kinda stuck in the f*ndom rabbit hole 💔 so you *need* me, it's not optional atp.. plus it's kinda cute that u got urself into such a mess 😣 adorable, actuallyyy! 💕 likeee, can i pet ur little addiction before we say bye bye to it forever?? it's so cuteeeee !! <3333 ugh, but that whole masochistic-cashspurt-delete ur future for funsies thing? red flag tbh.. so it's gotta go 💔 i love you no matter what tho !! ~ 💕 i just think quitting alone is rlly just setting urself up to fail~ like.. i even saw stories on f*ndom twt about losers fetishizing failure n relapse? can u believe that? 😭 love youuu!!

YES i'm aware that i forgot to schedule that april fools' joke tweet, no i didn't actually relapse like what 😭💕

dear diary.. i kinda likeee, relapsed? 😣💕 and like, i soooo don't regret it <3 .. every1 would probs hate me if they found out but ugh, that's their problem.. therapy's just kinda likeee, cringe?? 😭 like, be fr, some lil png file pops up in my DMs yapping some fanfic sob story about f*ndom or debt or w/e.. and i have to do the whole "baby im soOoOoO sorry" routine LMAO ⁉️ are they stupid?? being fucked up little addicts is the bestest cutest thing about them 💕💕 i love them sooo much, but is reverse therapy a thing?? like,, mby a quick lil career change moment.. i think i wanna make them worse <3333 i'm not letting them ruin the thing that makes them sooo adorable 💕 pushovers r the cutest things everrr and i wanna nurture every lil bad habit they have 😣

relapse is soooo hot but i'm better than that 😣 gonna take a lil break over the weekend to calm down so i don't do anything stupid..

can we at least just admit that f*ndom is rly rly hot?? 😖💕 i got this stupid therapy job as like, one of those "feel good" redemption arcs.. but trying to hold back while u tease me with cute lil stories about how it fucked up your life is just ughhh, i want a taste 😖

i never made like a dm fee or anything bc it's super f*ndom-coded?? (like, soooooo not me) 😭 now i have sooo many requests that im just too lazy to go through and i feel bad because some of them are cute and they just talk to themselves in there 🥺🥺

pssssst, it's me ur catfish bestie + #1 believer !! 💕 listen, ik it sounds crazy.. but i'm here to rescue you 😣 because nobodyyy else will Çevir

i loooveeee the modern job market sm because all u need is a cute pfp and lots n lots of confidence to land any role 🥰

um, relapse hours 😣 time 2 rent out ur throat as some scammer's onahole for negative pay.. 💔 except no !! im firing you. 💕 ur laid off, effective immediately, terminated by love 'n compassion 🥰 we're starting a new life together and i'm never ever letting u relapse again <3

im not perfect and there's a tiny tiny tiny little chance we relapse together but at least it'd be cute in the unlikely event it happens 😖