fictional

@NUFCThreatLevel How this got selected for television…

Brentford not the only offenders, but still.. Defenders walking half the length of the field, up for a long throw. Not even quarter of an hour in. Boring. It’s a corner to the opposition if the goalkeeper keeps hold of the ball half as long.

Put it in the Louvre

@MLS it was cool when google pulled the starting lineups and showed the information about games before your website revamp and lineup component became so resource heavy it times out and google doesn't grab the info...

@_rektnick @rektguy They just never stop. $REKT WORLD DOMINATION

The REKT-team is building the REKT-brand REKT-guys are building the REKT-brand @rektguy is building the REKT-brand They all do it with massive conviction, belief and dedication. And when $REKT hits a billion market-cap they all think the same: yeah that makes sense and we are still early! Jobs not finished…. $REKT World Domination

@coffeebreak_YT On the next episode of Ow My Bags

???

@Regista10_ @jaffa_5 In an age of engagement bait paying the bills is any of it worth listening to? Who can afford to just lay it out bare? It’s actually not economically viable for a journalist.

How the media works: Eddie Howe doing terribly = Newcastle would be stupid to get rid. He should stay. Eddie Howe doing brilliantly = he should be the next Man Utd or Chelsea manager. He should leave. It's almost as if they give zero fucks about Newcastle well being 😅 #nufc

Internet history chapter end marked?

For reference.

@Real_Rob_Warner do PL kit name sets have to go on a specific arc? The curvature used for longer player surnames on today’s Spurs away kits look like a design error… Nike’s AI again?

@mumba88 @CraigHope_DM When I see Hopkinson and Howe speaking publicly now it feels like a couple who are refusing to tell their friends they're getting a divorce because they don't want to ruin an upcoming family event.

@fictional @CraigHope_DM Yip. He's brought it up a few times but it was ignored because of 'time on the training pitch' - guess that's not the issue

🚨 Eddie Howe after NUFC defeat at Palace... 🗣️ "Those numbers (25 points lost from winning positions) are incredible. It's blighted our season. The fact we haven't been able to consolidate really good passages of the game, but also to go on and score more goals and continue to attack. That's not the tactical instruction we give the players. We don't want to go 1-0 up and change to a mentality of defending, but we've done it, so I can't say it hasn't happened. But then if you are going to defend, we have to defend better than we did. We gave them few chances, but we still look vulnerable towards the end of the game, and that's hugely disappointing. 🗣️ "The first goal we conceded, I think is self-inflicted. It's not good enough, through minimal threat. And of course the second goal is an individual error with very little time left in the game. There's no way we should have lost that game. We had a younger team today, but that's no excuse. There's enough experienced internationals on the pitch to navigate the defensive aspect well enough"

@mumba88 @CraigHope_DM In this context he makes it sound as if it's a terminal issue throughout the season also.

@CraigHope_DM Eddie is constantly telling us the players basically aren't listening to what the coaching team asks. So what's the issue? Poor messaging in coaching or a set of players that don't have respect for the manager anymore?

@NUFCThreatLevel To do that whilst sliding on your arse at that speed on a deflection is actually astonishingly difficult. Try that 1000 times I doubt you get it more than once? I joked Puskas contender when it went in… well…

That’s a stepover and finish.

@NUFC Puskas contender.

OSUUULLLLAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

@AngelNufc @NUFCThreatLevel It's highlighting the difference between Premier League and Bundesliga centre backs. A lot of his best play happens at the edge of the box and running at the box. He can't do the same thing further up against more dominating defenders. youtube.com/watch?v=WbH2OO…

@NUFCThreatLevel Feels like a panic buy. Doesn’t get into the box enough, can’t hold it up under pressure, doesn't jump for headers, and the league just looks too quick for him. That’s on the club/Howe, Howe has final approval, and he approved i,t knowing Nick doesn't fit the system or league.

Normally you’d be encouraged that Germany’s number nine can’t force his way in to your starting XI… If the problem is he just doesn’t ’fit the system’ that’s a massive failure by someone making these decisions, given what we’ve paid. #NUFC

@NUFCThreatLevel Sadly this has the next manager coming in and using a player to their strengths will be heralded for "making a player" of... an already very talented player as we saw with Joelinton and Howe. If you were ever looking for a Bruce and Howe comparison...

unemployment final boss:

@rekt2160 @NFTMrsPeach @_TFL_ HBD and congratulations on having a fantastic celebration of it!

I’m a 90 year old man trapped in a 40 year old body. The beautiful @NFTMrsPeach took me to The French Laundry to celebrate the occasion. A truly once in a lifetime experience

@Real_Rob_Warner Where can we bet on if the bookies are going into profit today though…

I rarely bet, but had a builder on the Arsenal match. Only needed a shot on target from Madueke to scoop a big lump. Lesson learned 🙄

@Real_Rob_Warner They've hung themselves out to dry using AI as part of the design process in the press release about the mess up anyway. Handed over the stick to be beaten with.

It's just not a good shirt. Not even just the shoulders, none of it seems to fit properly. It's a real issue.

I sent ChatGPT an audio file of a series of FART sound effects and asked what it thinks of "my music" and this is what it said