firebender0001

Hi! I just want to say please read this with an open mind if you hate me or love me. If not, totally okay I’ve been going back and forth in my head on whether to post this or not but if I don’t, I feel like I’ll never let it go and you never know until you try! I’m not saying my actions years ago weren’t wrong at all, my use of words that were so shameful and ignorant in a context where it’s embarrassing for me to look back on. As I should be embarrassed and I have never said or thought otherwise. I joined NoPixel and roleplay became my most fun hobby and ended turning into something so much bigger for me. It was the whole reason why I built my first PC…. Along the way it turned extremely tumultuous and became some of the best but worst years of my life. I’m not saying this for sympathy, that’s not what I’m asking for at all. I’m trying to say that person is someone who I do not recognize, and will never be ever, ever again. It’s never who I was, or who I wanted to be. I understand people have thoughts on me that will never change, that’s okay. I understand you’ve seen things I regret but I never showed my side of the entire experience. I don’t want to. That’s something I would never do to anyone. I tried to persevere because I knew the person I wanted to be and I wanted to fight for my happiness. To get out of that situation in general and just want everyone to be happy and move on. I went through months and months of something so insane I still cannot grasp parts of it or make sense of it still. But regardless, I only wanted to be a better person, friend, community member. I’ve worked through it with the help of so many amazing people close to me or not who owed me nothing. I became someone who I am so proud to be today. I am beyond grateful. I’m asking for a chance for you to see me now, not past me. Happy me, free me, me who isn’t pretending to be an extremely toned down version like pretty much nothing like me…. I hope that made sense I joined NoPixel and became an active member of their community, I remember going over applications I loved roleplay THAT much. I regret straying from what I actually wanted. But I still do and think it can be such a fun environment and way to make funny improv content with so many like minded fun people. I don’t want to keep rambling and I really hope to get a chance to be in the roleplay scene again. As the Lyndi who first joined NoPixel but like an even better 5.0 version (get it) And I’ll never ERP again