Farmer Stan

They said school’s out but I’m still studying

At advanced auto parts getting my battery changed by a goth chick on graduation day

@conyecobson Best $30 I’ve ever spent

Do not let @gabekeith58 near this.

@conyecobson What’s the rubric for a great costume

@gabekeith58 It can be a good costume but it probably won’t be a great costume

Your Barbie costume does not need a reference photo.

@conyecobson What if it’s a deep cut?

Alternatively, if your costume needs a reference photo to be understood, it’s not a great costume.

If your underwear don’t have holes in em are you really living to the fullest?

@conyecobson That is a question one can only answer in their own heart

If Olivia Rodrigo doesn’t feel pretty enough then what hope is there for the rest of us

Me speaking at a funeral: *Opens Prezi

What if we kissed at the Coconut Bar & Grill at Howard Johnson by Wyndham?

Wiener dog name: Coney

@FettiJosh This is weird, but don’t sweat it

If you test drive a motorcycle does the salesman just hop on the back?

@conyecobson No balls

Might drive to Tampa and see if she wants to hang out after the show tonight

I will be in the same room as Taylor swift in less than 48 hours!!!!!!!

My pronouns are hunter/gatherer

@conyecobson 🫴

Reply with a 🫴 and I’ll give you an unbreakable curse spoken in a language known only by the ancients

Girl are you a criminal? Cuz I just felon love with you

Professor: You shouldn’t rely on the textbook, try to paraphrase Also Professor: Your grade would be better if you used more scholarly sources.

@Th1ccPap1 Speak for yourself 💰💸💵💶💷💴🤑💲

@gabekeith58 Everything isn’t about money though is it

I think I would fit in well in Australia

Are high school reunions real?