Sam, elder sister of the darkness (she/her)

Good morning. Going to pin this to put my health saga since Valentine's Day in one place. Cw bc health stuff and mental health a little bit.

These are, at this point, likely permanent. I am immensely grateful for the people in my life now, who have loved me through all of this, even when I became a burden. My kids (my 120 students) think my brain damage jokes are hilarious.

Brain update. I have developed migraines post-Traumatic Brain Injury. Pushing too hard, migraine. Weather changes too fast, migraine. I still have increased cognitive strain and fatigue.

- increased symptoms of PTSD, anxiety, and depression - communication issues (forgetting or 'losing' words and sentences/thoughts, difficulty articulating thoughts, stumbling over words and phrases, and I have developed a stutter)

I just published Burial Clothes- this morning's all saints worship #sermon #gospelofjohn link.medium.com/YwN2NJUHeOb

I got some really good news yesterday! There’s this medical thing that I need that I thought was at least a year off if not closer to 2 years. I got a call yesterday that it’s happening in less than 2 months!!! Of course the obstacle now is about $5000😬 venmo.com/u/NeyhartJN

this is an absolutely bananas complaint to have about the Vice President of the United States

Anyway I made pasta GF and vegetarien It was amazing

@MxAlejandraHope Oh I hate it more in context

I am that person who if it looks like someone is having a bad day, or tired, or whatever, I bring them treats. Coworker had a super rough class last year. Coworker got a lot of treats. Coworker no longer looks. No think, no look, only nom 😂

I accidentally Pavlov-ed a coworker 😂 I bring her treats so often (baked goods, snacks, candy) that she just takes whatever I hold out to her and pops it in her mouth without looking. Today it was cheese. She was not expecting cheese 🤷🏻‍♀️

My old memesis the doorframe strikes again No worsened TBI symptoms or new concussion symptoms, just a mild 'you rattled your skull and the bruise is mad' headache 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️

Swifties for Harris should do their own spaces just to test out that 8 million number for Elon

So much so that the lullaby is all that is needed. That the violence and pain that made it need not be spoken of anymore. And I may be a ways from healing that. But I will make my life and my home a lullaby. A place that need not be escaped from.

Make my life a lullaby. I can't imagine a future, but I do know that whenever I go, I want my life to have been that. I want whatever life I have built for myself to sing like a lullaby. Soft, sweet, safe, kind. Absent of pain, or fear.

There will be pretty pictures but also heavy thread topic, soooo cw/tw for ptsd related things, including su*icide (star to keep the 🤖s away) I saw this meme the other day.