Glenys Hanlon

@Mummabae @insiderlauren You had to wareing it then 🤣🤣🤣

@han85442 @insiderlauren She hated me anyway so nothing more I could do 😁

Brilliant scoop well done Ellie - this is a MUST read for all parents and caregivers. I never thought I would be considering home schooling but it’s looking more and more likely at this rate.

@insiderlauren Frightening.

Seriously if you’re reading this tweet from outside the UK and are planning to travel to London - DO NOT waste your money. The capital city is an utter dump now. It’s dangerous and I refuse to take my children now - I’ve seen too many horrors there. My old neighbourhood Clapham today ⬇️

@Mummabae @insiderlauren 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@insiderlauren I wore my free Tommy shirt on the school run, immediately I got pulled by the head on way back round, she said no one has complained but they might so can you not wear it. From that day forward I wore it every Monday Wednesday and Fridays and gave her a huge grin at her each time

A reminder to all my followers, please remember to exercise regularly. That is all, carry on. 🎩

Walking down memory lane is a hoot! (Repost 16/07/24) The lady of the Manor and I are at odds again. She has labeled me ‘uncouth’ and lacking any and all ‘joie de vivre.’ I let out a literal gasp in actual shock! It all began when I came in from a rigorous afternoon in the greenhouse, in my ongoing quest to create an Eden-like oasis for my beloved. I was somewhat glowing with a dampened brow and an all-around ‘fragrant odor’ when I sauntered past her and announced that I was going to shower before dusk cocktail hour. As I mentioned this, she casually informed me that my bathroom was currently occupied by a handyman who was fixing the door, which has been perpetually sticking for the last eight years (I told her that I was going to do it, but of course, it’s never on her timeline). Being the magnanimous laird that I am, I ignored her thinly veiled swipe at my masculine abilities, and she informed me that I should use her boudoir. I quietly rolled my eyes in my head so violently it gave me a mild headache, but nevertheless, I made my way to her bathroom. After stepping into the steaming flow of water, I began looking around for the soap… sans soap. Not a single bar. Surveying her shelf of lotions, potions, creams, scrubs, and a startling array of loofahs, I discovered a ‘body wash’ by Lancôme in the Trésor flavor. I shrugged and began to use the offending product. After an appropriate amount of rubbing, scrubbing, and delicate washing, I began to rinse off. Well, this concoction of oily witchcraft doesn’t actually wash off unless you use enough water to fill an Olympic-sized swimming pool while scrubbing your skin with the same voracity as if you had spilled cat food juice on your fingers. It doesn’t come off! Its base ingredient must be Teflon and silicone. I began to scream after 27 minutes for the Lady of the Manor to assist me in this vortex of washing hell I had found myself in, and when she burst into the bathroom, all she did was snatch the Lancôme bottle out of my hand and tell me I was wasting her favorite body wash (egad, there is more than one in here!) and to get out of the shower. I told her that there was no soap to use, and she looked at me incredulously and said, ‘Nobody uses soap, except the uncouth.’ I was incensed. Turning on her heels, she flipped the hot water tap in the sink, which instantly delivered a stream of freezing cold water in my shower! I swore. Out loud… I’ll not apologise. After scurrying out and skulking to my bedroom to dress, I am in two minds as to whether or not I will attend this evening’s drinks. I think a message needs to be sent.🎩 —————————————————— 🎩Update: I’m sitting in my room with a sore backside due to slipping on the floor because my skin is still slick like the Exxon oil disaster, and I cannot gain any traction.

A picture is worth a thousand words. This one however has left me speechless

HRH Princess Of Wales ✨ .We love you Catherine 💖 #PrinceofWales #PrincessCatherine #QueenCatherine #RoyalFamily @KensingtonRoyal

I find myself in what can only be described as a domestically perilous situation. Again… Some time ago… recently enough that I cannot plausibly plead the passage of years… the Lady of the Manor gave me a piece of advice. Not a casual suggestion, mind you, but the sort of calm, measured instruction that experienced wives deliver to husbands who are moments away from making a regrettable decision. I remember the occasion vividly. Acutely. She spoke with patience. With clarity. With the quiet composure of a woman who knows she is addressing a man who will shortly ignore everything she is saying. I, naturally, nodded in a manner designed to convey deep understanding and mature responsibility. Unfortunately, this performance was entirely theatrical. Because while I was nodding, my mind had drifted elsewhere… to matters of great importance, such as whether the kettle had boiled, or if it might be socially acceptable to have another biscuit. And so the advice… whatever it was… passed straight through my consciousness like a polite guest who realises he has come to the wrong house. Which brings us to the present moment. A problem has arisen. A problem which, I am told, could have been effortlessly avoided had I simply done the thing the Lady of the Manor instructed me to do. The difficulty, you see, is that I have absolutely no recollection of what that thing was. None whatsoever. I know advice was given. I know I acknowledged it with great dignity and several reassuring nods. And I know… beyond any reasonable doubt… that I did not do it. What I do not know is what it was. This leaves me in the rather delicate position of wandering about the Manor attempting to look industrious while secretly hoping the matter resolves itself before the Lady of the Manor appears and asks the inevitable question: “Did you do what I told you?” At which point I shall be forced to deploy the only strategy available to a husband who has failed both to listen and to remember. A thoughtful pause. A distant stare. And the desperate hope that she never asks me to specify which instruction it was. Because if she does… I fear the Lady of the Manor will discover that her ever attentive Laird did not ignore her advice… He simply misplaced it entirely. 😬🤦🏻‍♂️🎩

@insiderlauren @jessphillips I will be there Lauren

Hi 👋 @jessphillips by the end of this year mark my words - the area you’ve tried to bury and silence? It will be dominating news agendas. Your safeguarding failures pertaining to women and children should see you serving life in prison.

@insiderlauren Come join unite the kingdom if you value the uk 🇬🇧 support us all . "

I’m not sure what’s funnier - the fact these clowns think they can stop Tommy and patriots or the fact they’ve only had 3 comments on the post 🤣#LOL #TryHarder