the human sadiepede 2

sorry i got cancelled online for saying that gollum has cum gutters

pervert alert

@heartpyres yes! i'll see you soon

@hell_doe Wait can we play that Rodney Dangerfield board game? I’m fascinated.

cathedrals everywhere

@gonad_obrien ignore that i just smashed that follow button

@hell_doe look how they massacred my boy

found your boyfriend's favorite bar

@gonad_obrien they're not paying repo man in there tonight, that's for sure

@feedbaguser i'm the boyfriend

@_bitchsword hahahahaha

@hell_doe oh my god i thought mr nancy’s changed their name i was like i have to leave

@vumpire so true!!

@hell_doe To a certain type of person this feels like a threat

everyone is loving my new bit, which is just repeating that anything could happen

@cob_is_online see something you like, playboy??

@hell_doe Lmao

i hear they're pretty much always playing paris, texas there

bringing this back in honor of dune 3 trailer

@virtualjew i was telling my pastry assistant a pretty bizarre story i'm currently witness to and another guy came in to listen and when i told him the update he was like "i have to be honest, this story is great but it was AMAZING in spanish"

@hell_doe it's worth it. speaking spanglish heals

getting to a point at work where i'm trying aggressively to learn better spanish sincerely for the purposes of el chismé

we've all got that friend who is inexorably in love with their own guilt

@aurora_f absolutely love this look... yes

I bought a blonde wig after my chemo treatment today, which feels like an odd move now, but I’m pretty sure it’s cute (no pic)

a nice breezy bit of poetry after two technically dense reads in a row

@dannarebb i believe that he loves you enough to see your need here

@hell_doe I am hopeful he’ll let me nibble on some of this electrical cable he just broke out, at least

doing my wifely duties while my husband installs some speakers on the gazebo

@dannarebb 😤😤 don't 👏 get 👏 construction 👏 screws 👏 unless 👏 you 👏 have 👏 an 👏 extra 👏 for 👏 your 👏 wife 👏 to 👏 snack 👏 on 👏

@hell_doe he apparently “needs them.” i can’t even have one. bullshit!

@dannarebb he's trying to keep you down, sister!!

they’re apparently not a snack :(

everyone's loving my broadly relatable NYC content

in 2026 we are feeling oddly protective towards a group of interestingly-variegated pigeons that frequent the tribeca streets