frank cappello

Amazing that Dems have a stronger stance on Hasan Piker than the war on Iran.

You will laugh and laugh and laugh and then subscribe to zeteo.com/subscribe Our fake Democratic Party consultant @heycappello is back, with his hilarious plan for the 2028 presidential primaries and a client hunt:

adding one more angle, which is that the lion is an unwavering defender of israel

my only update to this pitch is that every time bill finishes eating he then blames the younger generation of lions for destroying all of jungle society even though they’re only like 35 years old

@HBO you should do a show called Meal Time With Bill Rawr. It's about a lion named Bill who eats a gazelle live every Friday night.

nothing says “we’re serious about combating antisemitism” than having the audience vote for their favorite antisemite a lá American Idol

“former candidate” in the bio lol

subscribe to @zeteo_news if you enjoy news coverage that enrages Ted Cruz

hey rikki just fyi, working for the new york post instantly disqualifies your opinion on this

NEW: We asked NYC voters to summarize the Democrats in one word. Their response? "Nothing." But Zohran, AOC, Bernie: "They're offering something. They're not just running against the right." New voters say @ZohranKMamdani has a real message, and that affordability hits home.

imagine paying $150 million to book kushner and witkoff

"Here's a chance to tell her story in her words. And of course, launder her image and make a sh*t ton of money." In the newest satirical video from Zeteo's @heycappello, the ghostwriter of Kamala Harris' new book shares his secrets for writing a bestselling political memoir.

Say it with me: we would not be seeing this authoritarian censorship takeover in the United States, had both parties, the media and elite institutions not already greased the path with the muzzling of speech on Palestine.

join our editor-in-chief for a friendly conversation with the billionaire owner of a US military contractor right before she sells our news outlet to the son of the world’s 2nd richest man and don’t forget - think for yourself!

jimmy fallon is the vanguard now

Great to see @heycappello launching a Democratic campaign that nobody can believe in

feels like it should be a bigger story that Bill Ackman is publicly flouting the idea of backing his own mayoral candidate to defeat Zohran (& the thousands of volunteers who helped win the primary) in the general. the oligarchs aren't even hiding it anymore - they hate democracy

reminder: there was no “poll-tested data” showing a 33 yo Muslim socialist could win the NYC mayoral primary on a platform of populist social policies, and yet Zohran did this alone should discredit the entire democratic consultant class and the millions they rake in every year

new Cuomo mailer just dropped

hot take: Noah Wyle > George Clooney Wyle could play any Clooney part (Danny Ocean, Michael Clayton, etc), but Clooney could never do what Wyle is doing on The Pitt

trump is coercing america's oldest, most prestigious, and powerful universities to bend to his will and gut entire departments, but democrats wouldn't even attempt to raise the minimum wage because of the senate parliamentarian. never forget that