tay

Be kind to street animals, they have no one

6️⃣ more Saturdays until college football is back‼️🏈

Type of shit Joe Burrow pop out with right before a 3 game losing streak.

I can’t wait for college football

@BOSBruinsHC That’s the mediocre crisis. Wait until you hit 28. No one talks about ✨that crisis✨

is it possible to have a midlife crisis at 25

There are only 3 Thursday nights left without nfl or college football. Just. Three. After tonight, just 2.

If you find yourself defending a child molester, saying: “WE can’t be judged by OUR worst day”, you probably need to have your hard drives checked. x.com/WesternLensman…

life before this tweet:

i think people who say they get diarrhea from taco bell probably have like, zero fiber in their regular diets and eating a bean is like an intestinal 9/11 every time.

I used to fill my red solo cup with a mix drink made in someone's bathtub... There's just no way this diarrhea lettuce is taking me out….

finally english people can shut the fuck up about football and get back to putting beans on toast and skipping dental appointments

Lowkey I’m bblphobic as fuck

If you're an IBS Warrior and you eat the poop lettuce it actually fixes your stomach

the world is happier when it’s football season.

Males think they're brave enough to fight a gorilla but in reality they’re not even brave enough to tell their friend to stop making women uncomfortable.

Your dog don’t need to be in anyone’s establishment fr

Mike Trout will indeed be purchasing a Red Ryder carbine action 200-shot range model air rifle for Christmas in 2033.

i’m the second biggest procrastinator behind george r r martin

imitation crab is so disgusting! how the fuck do yall eat that??