hmrc

tryin' 2 think of good giveaways for March 12 - any ideas twittermates?

@technokitten - http://tinyurl.com/27zt2d

lookin' at followers and thinkin' we may do well with a hair tax @toodlepip and @technokitten might have to move to Jersey

walkin off dis hangova in st james's park - den over da Lion for a swiftie just im'd miliband - he's gone home da litew8

also reconsiderin' hair tax now iv seen wot @amayfield & @lloyddavis look like irl

@technokitten - ok, going with beard tax - a tax on everyone who does'nt hav a beard

just in with a kebab - those nobby styles are killin' in this cold

god these sums are hard - sorry, I've been away - it's not easy running the entire economy of the United Kingdom practically single-handed

@tinnion - tryed but got banned from paypal for "irregularities" - if u go private & pay for it urself, i'll pay you back when I can promise

@tildesley - I look forward to scrutinising your babysitting account with your next tax return

@jangles - I already know where u live thx

@thecustomer - sorry missed u yesterday as i was <s>pissed</s> very busy yes the hair taxes will be as overly complex as we ...

@tildesley - wot?!?! u are VAT registerd as a babysitter & u charge £5 - u must be sitting on a whole lot of babies - or is it babe-sittin'?

@tinnion - no worries man. we knows how hard it is to get by when u iz a lazy bastard

phew - today's the day... (absolutely shitting myself) give.me.more.whiskey.

ok, my bowels are completely empty and I've thrown up 3 times already. time for a quick bacon sandwich I think - anyone coming to Da House?

seems to be going pretty well so far. thank god for laphroaig and ibuprofen.

btw I think the best twitter coverage is @mickfealty - good ole slugger

@tinnion - yes <s>our operatives</s> PC World engineers would love to see your lolcats as a break from looking for other "ev ...

Fell asleep at my keyboard after the 2008 budget. Just woken up by current idiots in gov @-ing me. it's 2019 and Twitter is still going! Anything else happen?