Hotcock

His newborn is asleep right next to him, call him

What do you mean gene hackman isn’t a crazy molecular biologist

Complaining to my wife who just gave birth that the toast I stole from her is hurting the roof of my mouth cause I burned it eating pizza three days ago

Hey Aaron, just walked past your desk and your phone lit up with a notification saying “George hard R Martin has liked your post” can we have a chat?

@acapulco_denver Out on mad men avenue

just finished mad men. first time watch. binged it all in about 2.5 weeks…. gonna miss hanging out with my friends, the mad men.

Nude metal fans “vulgar display of penis”

If the nazis won shit would be called like mien kraft etc

The head whipping around lmao

Superficially cutting my penis so I can show off the scars and evidence that I have been fucking/have fucked before

I listened to chapter 2 of Phil Collin’s’ audio book three times over until I realised Spotify was broken. Sitting here thinking how long this bloke is going to mention Santa bringing him a drum kit

I’m not candid, I’m cando, get out of the past and think of your future actions

🤙Gnarcissist🤘

Twin Towers ✊

My wife told me she was up late listening to the strokes but I was confused because I didn’t hear any music when I snuck off to jack it in the ensuite

Kissing hands and shaking babies

Hate Strickland but hate Chimaev more, great stuff

Holograms but at what caust

Strange things happen when you blow a guy named Chris

Falling asleep trying to finish the assigned reading n waking up on assessment day with nothing like “Austen 3:16 just kicked your ass”

I’m starting a guitar channel on TikTok