Ray-Dar

It's insanely expensive to be alive right now but at least none of us are having fun.

Shout out to everyone who takes the back off the remote control and rolls the batteries around instead of just replacing them.

I'm starting to think we aren't here for a good time or a long time.

No offence- but why would anyone choose to go big when the alternative is getting to go home?

I'm at the age where I know more of the medications mentioned on The Pitt than musical guests on SNL.

My sister told me to just be myself. Now everyone is upset and I have to apologize.

Once the weather gets warmer, I'll be unstoppable. Unless it gets too warm. Then I'll be stoppable again.

My stomach hurts. I wonder which one of my 70 unhealthy habits is causing it this time.

I heard someone say: "True wealth is mental health." Great, I'm poor twice now.

Boomtown Rats “I Don’t Like Mondays”

We should've stopped somewhere between discovering fire and filing taxes. We did too much.

Friendly Reminder: March is Procrastination Awareness Month.

Feel free to take advice from me but you should know I almost choked drinking the Pringles crumbs out of the canister.

I'm not overwhelmed because I can't handle it. I'm overwhelmed because I do handle it. ALL. OF. IT. ALL. THE. TIME.

I am not hard to find. I am at home. I have been at home. I will continue to be at home.

Believe in myself?! The same person that got me into this mess??

I'm getting old... all I do is check my email, my bank account, and the weather

Super pumped! My loan got approved. I’m closing on a full tank of gas this weekend.

Super pumped! My loan got approved. I’m closing on a full tank of gas this weekend.

Easter Egg Hunts are canceled this year. Kids will now hunt for all missing cutlery.