Austin Witt

@catdaddyaddie Go to a Family Physician that does general practice and women’s health.

@stebertstebert Okay but what about the hospital?

@MaseManDPT On the contrary, they created physics. He has total control of it

The Greeks don’t believe in physics, apparently.

Who wants to bet on how many times this cab driver will call me sweetie, sweetheart, baby, honey, etc. on this 7 minute cab ride?

Monday Mood

*affects ketchup caviar obtaining voice* Hi @Twitter, Stage’s Lin Miranda here. Can we do something about this #VerifyNWalks

Crying is only acceptable at funerals, the Grand Canyon, and Admiral Schofield’s senior night.

Transfiguration Sunday comes right before Ash Wednesday, Reminds me of Rabbi Bunim's words - Keep two pieces of paper in pockets at all times. One - "I am a speck of dust." The other - "The world was created for me." We are loved and limited. Holy and human. Dignified and dust.

Maybe she’s born with it. Maybe it’s Fluoxetine.

@LukeBuchananana @SheaSerrano Shea is a cool 6’2 get outta here

Ookayyy, Kyler “@SheaSerrano” Murray

My fiancé thinks I'm the only person that does this so let's see: RT... if you bang your straw violently on a flat surface until the end pokes through the paper and then pull it out LIKE... if you tear the end off with your fingers and pull the straw out, no violence

Hi. I’m so excited to tweet w y’all tomorrow. Did you know that when you actually use #Brooklyn99 it has positive repercussions for the life of our show? OH THATS RIGHT YOU DID KNOW CUZ U DID THAT THING WHERE YOU SAVED OUR SHOW THAT TIME anyway c u tomorrow

@carisconner We truly don’t deserve her

🗣🗣🗣

@OfficialDTCB Yes on Peaky

Also looking for suggestions. Peaky Blinders seems interesting.

@syd_davis14 @coachtee17 I like to think without you and @Travis_Davis this doesn’t happen. Well done good and faithful

This is from last year’s PAC12 championship when we asked Tee to come home. It took over a year but he finally agreed. Welcome home @coachtee17!! Go Vols 🍊

Guys, we're just trying to see how many RTs this Bartolo egg can get.

@devonaccardi *fun

I love this basketball team. Patient. Explosive. Confident. Let's make a run, boys.