icguana

& for the lady, perhaps a fucking break?

If you’re having a bad day you have to find a small, round bird and look at it. Even just for 1 second

Your honor the moon was full

sorry i couldn’t hear you over my internal monologue

hey man we’re crossing that bridge when we come to it tonight if you want to pull up

There's no way everybody was kung fu fighting.

my favorite part of being alive is having to wipe the kitchen counters off 317 times a day everyday forever.

Made it to Friday but at what cost? Monday is literally in 20 minutes.

the countless sunsets i’ve missed bec of employment

to be divisible by both 2 and 3 at the same time is iconic

I'll have my Claude contact your Claude

"per my last email" = passive-aggressive, short, formal "per my NEXT email" = foreboding, commanding, what could be in that next email

Mango tastes like it’s serious about being a fruit

I love the phrase "bear with me" because it can either mean "be patient" or "the zoo heist was a success"

my competitive advantage is that i'm having fun

Solamente la supera la transición de chavismo a democracia:

old people are right about crosswords and morning stretches i will admit

The biggest competitor of Netflix now is the current geopolitix.

Why are you 25+ and still doing MUN / Parliamentary Debate? What went wrong for you

Los lectores de La fiesta del Chivo sabemos que, ahora, en Venezuela, es la hora de los Balaguer.