jackalam

Remember when i met my downstairs neighbor and she said oh hey youre the guy that cums really loud

OH THAT’S PROPER RANK 🤢 THAT TASTES LIKE HAIRSPRAY 🗣️🗣️

A WORLD WHERE GAY IS A NORM & STRAIGHT A MINORITY - HD

@FilmUpdates @ladbible

Robert Pattinson disagrees that vampires are the “hottest” fictional creatures. “I kind of prefer a mermaid to be honest.” (via: @ladbible)

@FilmUpdates @ladbible

@FilmUpdates @ladbible

genuinely just hit all 4 faces of that one vince mcmahon meme template

tried april foolsing a student of logic and he replied “it is highly improbable that a member of the local blue collar community would take the time out of their work day to do that” my brother in christ it LITERALLY says gullible on the ceiling. dude just look up

song im making and have no idea how to build upon but the sample is so fucking good

@jackalam__ too confusing. now idk what to believe

i was going to retweet something related to possessing a larger than average phallus, however it would more than likely create some sort of reverse psychology effect in those who see my retweet, who will assume that i actually have a small member, therefore i didn’t retweet it.

(pointing sniper at child) You nasty bitch. You nasty hoe. Don't make me go ape on you. You sick son of a bitch

Renate Reinsve in Kane Parsons’ ‘BACKROOMS’ In theaters May 29.

"are we good?"

@squinesstandard Hell

reading the morning paper

i made my first song on friday as a shitpost and since then ive made 2 more and im putting one on spotify. here’s the cover i slapped together in 5 minutes

@Dansplainer respect giggens

i always get scared for a second when the other anthony fantano reviews things

Let's get Geeky Blinded

My uncle, Uncle Closet, has recently started pointing out all the phallus-shaped foods I’ve been eating and asking if I’m some sort of queer