jillian

I WROTE A BOOK!!! you can purchase it on amazon as a paperback here: amazon.com/dp/1795381795 and as an ebook here: amazon.com/Absence-Light-…

i think i’m Also gonna make the move to bluesky ✌️ im jilliancares over there as well! :)

Me after saying “no updates from me” on my only call of the day

Maybe we were too hard on JJ Abrams for "Somehow Palpatine returned."

libbed out so hard i thought american people had empathy and common sense

the only thing america hates more than a rapist is a woman

this legit must be how katniss felt when they made her do the hunger games a second time

Adding "...If you even care" to the bottom of every work email.

Thanks for your email! Unfortunately, I have filled my pockets with stones and am making my way to the sea.

caroline: i think i want to have kids because i want to experience christmas again my mom: not a good enough reason. you could do that with a puppy!

actually few things more embarrassing than when you’ve had like One drink and then you trip or spill something and everyone’s like damnnn she must be fucked up! no, you degenerates. I am just clumsy! may a beautiful woman not simply be clumsy these days???

when you’re comfortable in bed and it starts raining

Why does a can of biscuits open like that. Is life not scary enough

when you set an alarm for 7am, but also for 7:05, 7:10, 7:15 and 7:20

The audio log you find in a trashed office in a sci-fi horror game:

REDBULLS ARE HEALTHY

logging into my work email that hasn’t been touched since before Christmas

you should be able to call off work for having teeth falling out dreams the night before

another day as a big girl with a big girl job twitter.com/margotposts/st…

A meeting? It’s December 18th and you’re scheduling a meeting????