jess

not groovy, not groovy at all

me putting on press on nails feels like drag

everyone cheats which is disheartening until u join the club, then it’s comforting

drivers license is a certified hood classic

i have yet to see a mentally healthy person w tattoos

every time a black person doesn’t tip, racism wins

i’m at the point in life where i would willingly join a fight club

i believe in the goodness of humanity because people flash their lights at other cars to let them know they’re about to pass a cop

i cannot explain why but i literally take costar as the word of God

getting into a fight where u are 100% right and then getting your period is the devil speaking directly to u

people who say “per se” give me SUCH bad ick

watching a 30 minute video in class instead of having it assigned for homework is a WASTE of classtime like im begging u to actually teach me something bro

@aintdannydevito 😭 no but this is hilarious

@jpayno21 its not the one where Todd tries to convince you to like Genesis

in an absolute downward spiral

drafts 😈

the beatles are the white chicken of music

one of my coworkers is a walking red flag and im currently hiding in the back to avoid another forced conversation about how much they work out

i shouldve quit my job the moment i got a nose bleed at work and my manager asked if i do blow