Jude

@sniffiesapp ?

It's insane that 20 years ago they discovered this frozen body in Romania and then everybody just stopped talking about it in 2 weeks 😭😭😭

@paulscheer The female orgasm doesn’t exist. A woman pissed on a guy one time during sex and they’ve been claiming they can ‘cum’ ever since. WAKE UP

Shoot us an email if you’ve been sexually disappointed by Clavicular

@rickasaurus Oh they were wearing that almond OUT

You can tell legal was involved in picking the skin color names at Crayola.

@blockhead4000 Actually choking down your wife’s disgusting cooking just to make her happy and ruining your body instead of being a perfect adonis for your own gratification is a sign of true pussy whippedness and nothing else

Choosing to have 6 pack abs when you have a woman that will cook you steaks and banana bread whenever you want requires a level of narcissism bordering on psychopathy

@KellyClarkstan I didn’t know McCauley Culkin gets down like that

When you left me all alone at the gas station

@lecternleader I’m pretty sure they smoke fentanyl off foil not out of a pipe

Don't forget to light your fentynalabras in honor of St. George Floyd todah.

@ThatsMyFloor You spilled. People want a male pop star so bad they’ll suck up anything

a lot of you are gonna be mad at me for this but it must be said troye sivan's music is like the same level of quality as tate mcrae the bar for male artists it just so low he seems like madonna by comparison

@polypocketknife I’m pretty sure it’s Mig

is there a pejorative term for military like what pig is for cops?

@charliacervo Girl, you tried it

🚨🚨 Confira trecho de uma música pro novo álbum da Charli XCX “Weaponized Tears”

@Navier_Tokes Because women are horrible and men are great

ok ik I might be generalising here but why is it that homosexuals tend to 'like' the gender they're attracted to and heterosexuals tend not to? - at least going by social media

@fartbuttsex30 White people don’t care but black people will start throwing up and crying if you call it a ‘cock’

white people be like: “i prefer the terminology “cock” over “dick””

@JayExci I can't believe Doctor Who had an It Follows episode, isn't the show meant to be PG-13?

Finally, 73 yards is being presented in the format it was always best suited for.

Future generations of British people are going to be soooo confused how we didn't know we were poor

@velodus Not true. Anyone going to the point of bonesmashing is doing it because they love to have a weird autistic project and not because they want dates, robbing them of that end goal wouldn't make them happier

So many dudes would live happier lives if they realized that realistically attainable bodies like this are actually more attractive to most people than if they were like, like, smashing their jawbones with a hammer to make their chin look a certain way.

@foriamtheway It doesn't sit right with me that the faggy one at the front was getting dragged along with the rest. I would have voted for her, you ARE Jacob Elordi queen

Love is not enough in this world

@beforethefevers She's developed so much more stage presence since the last time I saw her perform!

exactly

@CentralScruty It's some weird environmentalist thing. British people think they're gonna end climate change by having no AC even though Britain accounts for hardly any emissions globally

The way you guys exile air-conditioning from your lives is something I'll never understand.

@buffys MADONNA

starts with M and we all love her

@persimmongirl1 Yes and particularly women, because so few of them have the high muscle mass that is pretty common among men, but nobody wants to say that because of feelings

maybe unpopular opinion but bmi is at least somewhat accurate for most people. the majority of people do not work out and do live sedentary lifestyles. yes, bmi is inaccurate for those with e.g. high muscle mass, but that is not the majority of people

@vanikehuman The voice is Nina West, a drag queen who is famous for going onstage dressed as Tinkerbell and sucking grown men's toes

The Blue’s Clues drag parade featuring non-binary dolphins and trans beavers with double mastectomy scars.