Keith Chegwin

770 posts

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Keith Chegwin

Keith Chegwin

@keithchegwin

Entertainer/Presenter/Actor/Host I DO NOT HAVE AN AGENT Contact Me Direct: [email protected] https://t.co/9AzCGgshZz Gags - All Old & A Few New

Shropshire UK Katılım Mart 2009
4K Takip Edilen127.9K Takipçiler
Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Still not right. I will be back - But not for a bit yet. I’m so sorry
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Apologies for not tweeting. Back as soon as Xxx promise
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
If you say the word ‘gullible’ very, very slowly - It sounds like orange
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Gentlemen: Examine your prostate by wiping your bottom with Tesco value toilet paper
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Taking up scuba diving - I’m using a Walkers crisp bag - which has enough air in it to last for three hours
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
If you’re here for yodeling lessons please form an Orderly, Orderly, Orderly Queue
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Glastonbury crowds. Looks like one big audition for the ‘Walking Dead’
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Nicola Sturgeon…….Alex Salmond - I think there’s something fishy going on there
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Brekkie thanks to our neighbour Danny. Goose eggs are bloody huge!!
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Dad, who’s a road worker, has been stealing from his job. Didn’t believe him but when I got home all the signs were there (sorry)
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Mates in hospital - Got hoover stuck up his arse -Doctor says he’s picking up nicely
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Bought a pair of Nike's off a drug dealer - Been tripping all day
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Someone (Ellie) doesn’t want to be ridden & even the doggies (Harry & Poppy) are knackered!!
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Mrs wanted to try sadism in the bedroom. I said no but she twisted my arm
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Gonna have a Brexit themed Sunday lunch this weekend - No Brussels
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Mrs left me because of my Beatles obsession. Yesterday
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
My sincere best wishes to Ant @antanddec I know just how hard it can be. Be proud - you’re a very brave & honest man. Good luck x
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
Father’s day in Essex - where cards are sold in packs of five
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Keith Chegwin
Keith Chegwin@keithchegwin·
A Good Old Singing Competition on Saturday night TV. Pitch Battle. Just when you thought BBC had run out of ideas. FFS
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