ᴋᴇᴠɪɴ ᴇɪᴋᴇ

If the Knicks waited 53 years for a ring, so can your girlfriend.

The cashier at Home Depot just asked me if I wanted to round up to support the SpaceX IPO

🙄

“grant it” 🥴

Whats going on with mycareer

roughly once a month i'll show up to work with a fresh skin fade and someone will say "did you get a haircut?" 🥴

can't believe i spent my whole life becoming Good At Computer only for Computer to become Better At Computer

Akon really opened that Gwen Stefani song with WOOHOO! YEEEHOO!

Never forget that YOU are a data center. Drink some water!!

i am *not* afraid to roll up my sleeves (but i am afraid of getting dirty)

Corn plant just abt ready to emerge #cornwatch

1-0

i've run into the same coworker in the bathroom like half a dozen times this week and he gets more excited each time, while i get more upset

I’m taking a break from farming 2watch Indiana fever professional women’s basketball. I’m watching bc I am a follower of Caitlin Clark If u haven’t followed Caitlin Clark u should she is an all American sports hero from right here in Iowa Caitlin was a star at the Univ of Iowa

"listen to your body" my body: go get a cinnamon roll the size of a tire

Me when they finally bring food out but it’s for the other table

it's lowkey crazy how frequently people misuse basic idioms...just heard a podcast host say "one full swoop" lol yeah bro that's the best kind of swoop 👌🏻