lana

People that I’m jealous of: - ppl that live in madinah - hafizah - ppl that understand Arabic - ppl that have a lot more (correct islamic) knowledge than me - ppl that live in islamic environment where people don’t openly sin - ppl w religious family May He give us all of it

Sahabat seagama, sebudaya yg percaya balasan Tuhan, kawal diri. Jangan komen yg pelik2. Biar orang dengan hal rumah tangga mereka. Kawan2 yg mulut mcm longkang pun beringat, sometimes we get to eat the words we said about others.

Men who want blind obedience “because I’m the man” are conceited fools. Being the leader doesn’t mean you lack accountability, and are beyond being able to detail your reasoning, and show the structure of your insight. You are always talking about how men are less emotional and more logical, yes? Then when your logic is actually being taxed in a non-abstract way, and you are required to detail your thought process so you can be understood and scrutinised for the rightness of your decision making - why is that so difficult for you? Why then, suddenly, does your ego become an obstruction? Is this not you being more emotional than logical? If you are so wonderfully rational as a man, as you like to believe you are, would you not be able to simply share your reasoning? Why, in this context, is being logical and transparent suddenly a bad thing? Is it because to be so wounds your sense of untouchable authority? Is it because you are too arrogant as a man? To be a good leader is not to be arbitrarily tyrannical, withholding or beyond sharing your thinking. A good leader, can in fact, demonstrate the basis and motion of the thinking that makes up their discernment, how it informs their conclusions, and thus their judgement. Yes, being questioned and doubted all the time isn’t nice, men certainly don’t want to deal with endless heckling, doubt and interrogation. That is the opposite extreme. Arguably, never being trusted to lead without interrogation, is just as bad if not even worse than thinking you do not ever owe an explanation simply because you're in charge. The happy medium, the golden mean, the threaded needle so to speak then is very simple: When she is struggling and it's an important matter, you share your thinking with her, do this enough, and then after having built trust, she will just follow you without question in a general sense, because she understands you and feels safe knowing she can leave you to handle it. This means even if she isn't interrogative, but posits even the most delicate or softly asserted concern, you answer her fully and comprehensively, because she is only seeking reassurance through comprehension, it is not always some grand attack on your ego where she is "trying to hold you to account" - if she is a good woman, she simply wishes to remain on the same page as you. That is all. Truly, men who don't think they should ever have to explain their leadership decisions make extremely poor husbands, for they are tyrants wearing crowns that don't fit them.

Don't marry a shrek and try to change him because you'll end up being an ogre. Men are natural leaders, and they tend to have more influence on women. If his mum did a bad job and you are trying to change him by being his 2nd mum, you'll end up being a nagging wife

Building a secret inner world out of everything that bothers you, and letting it mutate inside you as you withhold it from your lover, is the fastest way to sabotage your relationship, wound them, and drive yourself insane. For all your talk of communication, this is one of your worst sins.

No benefits no reply

Amin Abdullah was the guard at the mosque in San Diego for years. He was key in stopping the shooters from reaching the children today. This was his final post on Facebook.

Always choose clean pain over dirty pain. Clean pain is the pain of telling the truth. The pain of leaving. The pain of disappointing someone. The pain of starting. The pain of being bad at something new. The pain of saving money instead of buying the thing. The pain of going to bed while the party continues. The pain of facing the blank page. Dirty pain is the pain of avoiding clean pain. The pain of staying too long. The pain of lying. The pain of living above your means. The pain of being known inaccurately. The pain of watching your life shrink around a fear you refuse to face. The pain of managing the consequences of cowardice. Clean pain is often sharp and brief, dirty pain is dull and chronic. Self-respect is paying the clean cost early.

The highest form of self-respect is making choices your future self does not have to recover from.

Allah has honoured you through religion, yet you humiliate yourself through sinning

Had a wealthy friend tell me that the ability to decrease time to any outcome is the one skill behind every successful person he knows. A few I apply constantly: - Decreasing the time it takes you to get out of a bad state will make you emotionally resilient - Decreasing the time it takes you to go from idea to executive will make you wealthy - Decreasing the time it takes you to turn a failure into a lesson will thicken your skin faster than anything else

Once I have known what it feels like to communicate with an intelligence match, or at least intellectually compatible man, I don’t think I can ever settle for anything less and sacrifice that anymore. Which is great, because all it has ever been before that is mostly miserable.

point B, and now we are arguing about point B and how they feel about point B (which I never said) which is now a whole new separated argument that I have to clarify and untangle for them. Then when can we finally get to my original point which is point A? It’s truly exhausting.

You know, communications with most men I have known have always only ever felt like muddy water — the more I say, the muddier the water gets. The constant misunderstandings that happen because they can’t just read my words, they read in between the lines things that don’t exist,

Adulthood has taught me to stop expecting people to return favors just because I helped them. But that doesn't mean you should stop being a good person. Why? Because the real reward doesn't come from humans, it comes from Allah.

Major cheat code for life: The ability to reset fast. You can start over at 10am, 2pm, or 6:30 at night. Zero reason to let one bad hour carry into the rest of your day. You can’t control what hits you. But you can control how long you sit in it. Resilience is a superpower.

Hasan al-Basri رحمه الله said: "O son of Adam, you will die alone, enter the grave alone, be resurrected alone, and be judged alone. So make your decisions as if you were always alone with Allah ﷻ." ~Hilyat al-Awliya, Abu Nu'aym al-Asbahani

Dalam setahun, malam-malam terbaik di dunia ialah 21-30 Ramadan. Manakala siang-siang terbaik di dunia dalam setahun ialah 1-10 Zulhijjah. Esok bermulanya 1 Zulhijjah. Perbanyakkan amalan dan doa pada hari-hari ini. #ذو_الحجة #العشر_من_ذي_الحجة