Jonathan Long

@Polymarket You retards are going to buy all the toilet paper again, aren't you...

JUST IN: People in at least three U.S. states are reportedly being monitored for possible hantavirus exposure.

@Jared_Carrabis Imagine if Breslow and Henry weren't retarded...

Munetaka Murakami is first in the American League (4th in MLB) in exit velocity (95.4) and number one in hard hit rate (64.5%) in Major League Baseball.

@ShopifyDevs @Shopify @ShopifySupport @tobi @harleyf Calling the cavalry to see if we can get some help with an app review before a group of students leave for semester break. Thank you! DMs open. 🙏 (or chat messages...whatever they are called now lol)

@LiamFennessy_ ABS Challenge?

Linda documenting the entire thing is crazy work

…and 7 flights for $597.48 is why Spirit went out of business.

@BOSSportsGordo Trade him for 3 orders of Lobstah Poutine. Sox would be getting the better value.

Chad Tracy told the media that they are considering using an opener for Brayan Bello in his next start.

@vocalcry CrossFitters, Cold Plungers, Just Found Jesus Club, MLM "Business Owner" Retards, Peptide Takers....and People Who Decide to Leave Miami. These are the groups of people who make you want to put your head through the wall every time they open their mouth.

No one: This guy randomly leaving Miami several one-star reviews in my replies:

@BrightSideSox Actually insane

$20 for a High Noon is genuinely disgusting work.

@RedSox Ship Bello to the moon

Solid first outing for Jake Bennett!

@hxxntrr Are these 90K G Wagons in the room with us right now?

Buying a G-Wagon for your LLC is the smartest tax move in America Section 179 of the IRS tax code lets you deduct 100% of the purchase price of a vehicle in the year you buy it, as long as the vehicle weighs over 6,000 pounds (gross vehicle weight rating) The G-Wagon is 6,945 lbs. So is the Cadillac Escalade. So is the Range Rover, the Tesla Model X, the BMW X7, the Lexus LX, the Ford F-250, and basically any heavy SUV or truck. All Section 179 eligible The math on a $90,000 G-Wagon purchased through your LLC: Purchase price: $90,000 Section 179 deduction year 1: $90,000 (100% of purchase) Tax savings if you're in a 37% federal bracket: $33,300 Tax savings on state income tax (avg 5%): $4,500 Total first-year tax savings: $37,800 Effectively the IRS subsidizes 42% of the purchase price. A $90K G-Wagon costs your business $52,200 after the deduction lands How the rules actually work: The vehicle has to be used 50%+ for business purposes. You document this with a mileage log showing business trips vs personal. Most operators easily hit 50%+ if they use the vehicle for client meetings, vendor visits, or any commute to a business location The deduction limit for a passenger SUV under 6,000 lbs is roughly $12,400 in year 1 (much smaller). Over 6,000 lbs the limit jumps to the full purchase price. The 6,000 lb threshold is the entire reason every successful operator drives a heavy SUV Bonus depreciation: if Section 179 doesn't fully cover the purchase (rare for vehicles), bonus depreciation kicks in for whatever's left. As of 2026 bonus depreciation is at 60% but congress changes this regularly How you fund the purchase: Stack 0% business credit cards. $90K of vehicle purchase routed through a dealer that accepts cards (or via Plastiq for the dealer that doesn't) sits on a 12-15 month 0% APR card. You drive the G-Wagon today. You get the $37,800 tax deduction at year-end. The credit card is at 0% for 12+ months while you pay it down from business cash flow Net first-year cost of the vehicle: $52,200 (post-deduction price), spread interest-free over 12 months. Effective monthly cost: $4,350 Or take a $50K-$90K equipment loan from a bank like SoFi or Bank of America Business at 7-9% APR. The deduction still applies. The loan is structured around the asset A client we worked with last quarter bought a 2024 Range Rover for his marketing LLC. Total cost $108K. Routed through Plastiq onto Chase Ink Business Cash and Amex Business Gold. Section 179 deduction in tax year 2024: $108K. He was in a 37% federal + 9% California state bracket. Total tax savings: $49,680 Effective net cost: $58,320 for an asset that was already going to be a personal car and is now a business asset with full deductibility. Plus he kept the credit cards at 0% while business cash paid them down through the year The IRS wrote Section 179 into the code to incentivize small businesses to buy equipment. Vehicles count as equipment if they meet the weight threshold. Almost every wealthy business owner uses this. Almost every small business owner has no idea it exists (we get 700+ score business owners $100K-$250K in 0% business funding and structure the Section 179 vehicle play alongside it. link in bio)

DON'T LET THE SOX GET HOT! #DirtyWater #RedSox

@nikitabier Yes. And the ability to remove inactive ones based on a time frame. Ex: inactive 120 days, 90 days, etc.

Would it valuable to know how many of your followers have been active on X in the last 24 hours?

@BoSoxInjection I swung and missed! I was certain it was Pedroia. Honestly, Beckett would be my last guess! Nice.

Ex-Red Sox pitcher Josh Beckett has revealed himself as the author of a now-famous quote about Alex Cora's firing. 🤭

@Jared_Carrabis Need a video of this like I need air to breathe

A plane just flew over Fenway with a banner that says, “Fire Craig! Sell the team!” Welp.

@RedSox Criminal this guy is not in some sort of hitting coach role...

The #RedSox today announced the following changes to their 2026 Major League coaching staff:

@StocHoliday84 @Polymarket Came here to make sure someone dropped this. My faith in humanity has been restored.

@Polymarket I see your dolphins and raise….

JUST IN: Iran is reportedly considering deploying "mine-carrying dolphins" against U.S. warships in the Strait of Hormuz.

@Savageboston A "CRAIG BRESLOW IS A TERRORIST" sign being flow over?

Keep your eyes on the skies above Fenway Park today. 👀

Everyone and their mother blasting Reta sold by sketchy sites run by broccoli-haired ex no-ship drop shipping demons. Sites with fake or copied COAs. Blindly blasting mystery compounds. Imagine the side effects down the line. Natural Selection at work.

@WallStreetApes “The Starbucks experience” - some blue haired Subaru driving lunatic handing you a shitty “grande” coffee that’s not even filled to the top because their 37 Liberal Arts degrees didn’t teach them how to fill up a coffee cup. Got it. ✍️

Starbucks CEO defends a cup of coffee costing $9 He says the customers needs to just not think about it as a $9 cup of coffee, you’re paying for the “experience” of getting a Starbucks coffee “In some cases a $9 experience does feel like you're splurging, and then what that means is we have to make it worthwhile.” He says Starbucks customers “want to have a special experience and regardless of what your income level is, in some cases, a $9 experience does feel like you're splurging — well, this is a really affordable premium experience” How out of touch could a person possibly be…

@nikitabier Possible to have an option to snooze topics longer than 24 hours?

The most snoozed (i.e., muted) topics since launching the snooze feature: 1. Crypto 2. Politics 3. Iran Conflict 4. Sports 5. Business & Finance 6. Gaming 7. Artificial Intelligence 8. Videos 9. Science & Technology 10. Entertainment & Arts