Luke

@sexual__penis Kind of need him

She matched his AAVE

@SalinaEstitties LMAO honey the writing was on the wall. We all love you and were pushing for you hard!!!

not the red corner 😭🤣

ran out of garlic AND onion powder at the same time

Salt air….

I’m helping with dinner tonight and my mom asked me if I prepped the vegetables. I yelled “BTS!” She smiled. She knew they were washed and chopped.

Opened bag on the train to get my umbrella and my Glinda wand from the chilis fillings martini fell out in front of everyone

You will never guess the last line spoken in this video even if you had five years to do so.

Me blaming my bowels on the salad I had last night and not the 2 cold brews I’ve had before 11AM

not sure if i had THE diarrhea or a separate, more niche diarrhea that only artists get

Dancing to Hung up and Get Together with all you vapid G’ed out look maxing gym muscle mean gay queens was one of the highlights my life. I don’t care what the bedroom keyboard warrior queers say!!

@JCov1 LMFAOOOOO

lindsey graham will babysit!

EVERYBODY GET UP AND DANCE

gay guy corporate job became more than just sending emails ….

Massage, coffee date, 3 job interviews, afternoon quickie with my otter neighbor

@imfat 2 lines

You’re offered 6M to do a single line of coke, wyd??

BREAKING: Senator Mitch McConnell has been spotted enjoying a hike amid concerns about his health

OOMF got a +1 to club confessions WE WONNNNNN

Just got off the phone with Mitch McConnell and he DID say yes mawma

omg i can't wait to watch rhode island tonigh-