MaliforniaGolf

I am "tweaks my back getting up from a chair" years old

Went to a party for the first time in a few years. Towards the end my stomach was hurting and I was hoping I didn't eat something bad. Nope, just forgot what it's like to hold my farts in.

Hey @HMHbooks, my kid L O V E S Little Blue Truck’s Valentine, but what’s up with this floating cow head?

@ShavedGolf @DirkHasWords @FortGeorgeBeer Cosigned

@DirkHasWords Cavatica stout by @FortGeorgeBeer

THIS! IS! STOUT SZN!

Eternally grateful for @ShavedGolf. Happy first father's day! We love you so much.

I’m Joe Biden and I approve this message.

@cadiayeg @verthandi I just found a therapist I like! It's been a tough couple of months and it's so helpful to have someone to talk to and to learn some new coping tools.

some of y'all have real fuckin toxic therapists, wtf

Now I want an octopus bff

Turned on My Octopus Teacher on Netflix last night because it looked stupid and then ended up watching the whole hour and a half documentary about a man befriending an octopus.

The Moana soundtrack still gives me goosebumps

After historically bad weather conditions burned ~10% of the forests on the Cascade west slopes in nw OR since Mon (our crude estimate, from Lane county north), the late shift feels like it’s time to appreciate the top 3 reasons to be optimistic about the upcoming weather. 1/4

September 11 Let's normalized talking about these tragedies too. Telling these stories too.💔😭

@verthandi Thinking about you. ❤️

people in my neighborhood are already leaving

It is really frustrating that everyone is saying these fires are 'unprecedented' and none of the news sites are mentioning climate change. Extreme weather events, drought, fires - welcome to the new normal.

@Jeffmapes Good.

My latest: Portland Mayor Ted Wheeler finds himself politically squeezed by months of protests. opb.org/article/2020/0…

If we give Donald Trump another four years in the White House, our planet may never recover.

@dog_rates Cooper the pooper

To celebrate #InternationalDogDay, we want to make a thread of 100,000 dogs. We have all trained for this. Please reply with your dog pics ❤️

Phat Nugz

My coworkers did not bark at the mail lady today!!

Who else still regularly wonders what's inside your butthole? It's pretty much the anthem of 2020 in the Golf household.