Get out of my pool

Being that I am the foremost expert on pools all I will say is that was indeed a little offensive.

@JackfromMiami How did you get that picture? That is @joshgroban right? Is it autographed? Is that my birthday present?

Relax my good constituents I'm back to celebrate the most important day of the year with my good people. Happy Birthday to Myself bitches.

@jamesshorts we do this every year for the Iowa state game. It is our tribute to the movie Cocoon and all the old creepy ISU fans.

Bring your booze and your women the mayor is having a pool party to watch the Hawks beat Iowa State. Credit to Norwood Teague for the idea.

Everyone please relax I'm on top of it. Already spoke directly with @NorWOODTeague to let him know we do allow skinny dipping in our pool.

Listen here Eastbrooke. I'm a day or two away from coming back into town. You all better tighten up your shit.

Upon my return you will be happy to hear the pool will be filled with water from Lake Michigan.

Hello constituents. I apologize for not turning on my out of office. Busy this week getting ideas on how to take the pool 2 the next level

Please tell me this is like 11-0 in ping pong. If up 2 in the first 6 min it is over and we can get to a re-run of the Simpsons.

Boom I'm the mayor!! I make a poor joke and a actual goal happens in the first 3 min. I might need to run for mayor of Mason city

It is still 0-0 here at the Eastbrooke pool. Reception tends to run slow at the pool does everyone else out these still have it 0-0?

In an effort to be trendy I have officially themed this week at the pool #sharkweek I really had the idea about 8 years ago #imthemayor

Today all of Eastbrooke is Japanese just to show how we feel about this sport @JackfromMiami #sushi #sake #howulikamymustache

Tonight is the night the mayor allows the neighborhood to all swap spouses and get it on. #eastbrookepubcrawl

Well folks..sorry to disappoint but with Larry Conrad being the Grand Marshall of band fest I was busy entertaining. The pool remains closed

The rumors are true. The first annual Larry Conrad skinny dipping challenge will officially open the pool next weekend.

Get ready the Eastbrooke best shot tourney is fast approaching. Winner gets a new floatee for the pool. Sign up with @DeetsBarLouie

Listen here @712blueliner my pool is scared. If you want a pass I'm going to need to see some growth out if you.

This is how the mayor unwinds after a disappointing loss. @DeetsBarLouie @ltzgohawks @JackfromMiami