Dad The Joke Man

3.5K posts

Dad The Joke Man

Dad The Joke Man

@mccarthyjokes

Joke Writer/Wrestling Fan/Father of 3/Forward Slash Enthusiast

Saint John, New Brunswick Katılım Mayıs 2011
295 Takip Edilen135 Takipçiler
Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
Matt Gaetz was most pumped for the AG nomination because in between A and G is A minor.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
They've really done a number on Hydroxy chloroquine and Ivermectin, but I think the far left's opinion on the best medicine is a more significant factor in RFK getting his job.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
Well we can't get Michael Buffer. We can't get Bruce Buffer. How about Buffering?
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
Leo DiCaprio turns 50 today and if you're his girlfriend, that's this many 👐👐👐👐👐
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
Narcan is the Uno Reverse card but it's for Dos.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
Who gets misgendered more? Trans women that are good at sports or Cis men that are bad at them?
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
Butter is whipped cream that didn't give up.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
A good spouse will help you up when you fall flat on your ass. A great one yells "5 second rule!".
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
Ever bought something from a vending machine just because it was directly over a dangling stuck item and even though you don't really want either selection you're still willing to gamble $1.75 on a chance of a 2 for 1?
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
The Paul brothers are Cleveland streamers.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
Bluey is Bleu Nuit without the "NNNN" sound, yet still has a more satisfying finish.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
One time I wished it was 11:12 and it came true damn near immediately.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
A swear jar is the closest I'll ever come to Fuck You money.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
Trump shouldn't be lying about folks eating pets in Springfield. He should be singing a super catchy song about turning them into a vest.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
You can complain about tax dollars going toward feeding migrants. You can complain that the SPCA is overcrowded. You can't do both.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
I want to publish a gentle parenting guide printed only on recycled wooden spoons.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
My pronouns are him/his but that's neither her nor their.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
C Pap? Is there another kind?
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
It's a shame the Minecraft movie didn't come out 15 years ago. Would have been perfect for Blockbuster.
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Dad The Joke Man
Dad The Joke Man@mccarthyjokes·
All the times Oasis said they'd never reunite they should have said Maaaaybeeee.
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