Safe Community Coalition

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Thank you for tuning in tonight and thank you to @LynnLyonsMSW for sharing her expertise, wisdom, and humor with our community this evening.

Lyons: It's hard to tolerate your kid's distress. But when we normalize it, they get through it!

Lyons: Kids are going to have big emotions. Validate them. Ask how you can help. Let them practice feeling big feelings. Avoid jumping in with your own distress and avoid jumping in to fix it. #anxiety

Lyons: If your main goal is to help your child avoid something, you are enabling the anxiety. Rather, help them develop the skill to tolerate the uncomfortable feeling.

Lyons: "The goal is to change the relationship to the worry when it shows up rather than to change the world so the worry goes away." #Anxiety

Lyons: If you have an anxious kid, you'll want to "front load," give the kid the info and plan ahead of time rather than in the moment.

Q: from audience: Are there gender differences in #anxiety? A: Statistically girls are more anxious than boys. Each shows anxiety differently though.

Q: from audience: How do you address kid's existential worries? Lyons' answer: Go micro instead of macro.

Lyons: "The biggest gift you can give your kids is to experience joy in their presence."

Lyons: At the beginning of Covid, what kids said is "it's not so bad, because I'm .getting more sleep, I'm connecting with my family more, I'm posting to social media less."

Lyons: Watch for negative connection such as bragging about how little sleep they get, how many diagnoses they have.

Lyons: Teach kids to do "awkward empathy." You don't have to know exactly what to say; you can offer empathy as a connection.

Lyons: Delay giving kids smart phones. Focus on social skills.

Lyons: Connection, connection, connection. It is key. It always comes out on top.

Lyons: Kids need messages of hope. We want to foster the belief that change is possible rather than that they have a "disease" or that "mental illness" is who they are. #anxiety

Lyons: You don't have to imagine dying in a plan crash; you'll do fine the first time! #Anxiety

catastrophic thinking

Lyons: Catastrophic thanking / catastrophic parenting = you are imagining all the bad things that are happening. You think it's problem-solving but it's not...

Lyons: Rather than global thinking, help kids break things down into smaller parts: beginning, middle, and end.