El Profesor

Everything will be OK.., maybe not today, but eventually!

@kiruti Haha… tebu nambari ya kipande yako uone mazingaombwe

I blocked that sim swap kitambo. I have never understood why Safaricom doesn't have it on by default.

@Bookten8 Jicho ya left nani alipiga ngumi sasa

Lakini Siah anakuanga ameweza

@tonynjeru_ @chabuh1 @Newtonnizzoh They did, alafu uka confirm bado kweli ni wewe, years after registering. Get ready get ready

@chabuh1 @Newtonnizzoh ,😂 you thought they never had it before?

Hapo kwa kufile returns via WhatsApp, KRA ccoked so hard, unafile zero returns na 45 seconds. Impressive!

@EnaCoach KDS 585C iko on schedule sio?

Introducing Hanta Virus

The message is simple and direct!

naisha sana😂 ##RejectFuelPrices

@KRACare @drunkenlectures we are experiencing a system downtime thus your service request cannot be acted upon at the moment. We appeal for your patience as our technical team resolves the issue and request that you contact us at a later time. Have a nice day.

Fuel up 46 shillings Electricity up by 4 shillings with less units Salaries stay the same Taxation stays the same Unemployment at its highest with industries closing Parliament is silent All 349 of you will go

@badtingt Artificial Insemination is a thing?

I will never show my husband

Guys as we continue mourning please help me retweet this , my bestie’s @maridzadzi sister has been missing for days , any leads to her whereabouts will be highly appreciated. Please guys help me retweet this

@polo_kimanii Apa Jason Statham anaingia na anamalisa umbwa yako kama ame left bila wewe kujua

In homesecurity there’s something we call CPTED. Crime protection through Environmental design. And this right here we call it defense in layer. Such a layout is not entirely designed to make the place inaccessible,but to delay the intruder by making her use more time,effort,risk so that theres more time for her to be detected in the process. Its the same reason we also have two walls in prisons. Hapa ukipanda ngazi,ukate electric fence na alarm ikose kulia,kabla uingize ngazi,upande ukate ya the 2nd wall,they will have already catched you. Risasi pap!

Hiyo nyongi Catholic Priests wanakuaga nayo in that small old birika with a chain. Sidhani inakuaga imekauka poa. Today we almost suffocated in a tent during mass.

If you can type Agikuyu hand-written text accurately fast 5hrs/day you can do 26k

“Tonight, at my direction, brave American forces and the Armed Forces of Nigeria flawlessly executed a meticulously planned and very complex mission to eliminate the most active terrorist in the world from the battlefield. Abu-Bilal al-Minuki, second in command of ISIS…” - President Trump

@MkenyaMzi Alishikwa na kanjo uskii… hana Food handlers certificate

Allan hii ni mambo ingine na vile ilikua set kkula number 6 gadamn.wacha nitudi

@ManUtd Bruno 🖕🏼

ICED OUT.

@kipkruii @Is_javan Hio ni mingi sana…

@Is_javan salary ni 15k sio?

Nani ako huku anaishi umoja 1 anaweza taka kazi ya cyber, utafunzwa hata ukitaka

The latest 𝕏 algorithm has been published to GitHub github.com/xai-org/x-algo…