mey

@pulpy_fiction i like digging around in my fridge to find yogurts in various states of decay it makes me feel so metropolitan (...)

whenever i go over to my boyfriends house he feeds me three delicious home cooked meals a day with like homemade relish and salads and i don’t have to lift a finger and then when he comes over im like hi i have no groceries and failed to think about this until this precise moment

trying to do lots of things im not good at is not affirmation that #YESicandohardthings its more a hm. Does it end . situation

youd think twitter would train the reflex that makes one a precise and abbreviated speaker

i think being good at juggling is one of the hottest dork things you can do

a lot of cool people like [xyz] but i'm afraid to be part of the Less Cool majority

@elizabethbelsky since getting an espresso machine i order bullshit at coffee shops bc you know what? i don’t have Blue Coconut at home

Actual answer: preteens and teenagers are obsessed with these refresher drinks and they're driving a lot of sales because adults with jobs have pulled back on paying Starbucks prices for coffee they can make for pennies on the dollar at home.

asking my prof if i can write my documentary poem project about caroline calloway’s memoir tomorrow . excited to tell him all about the Condo

@arbresmuets i feel like is going to get ripped down… but maybe not. i saw like clusters of 10 cops on granville today…

it’s sooo pathetic we painted this stuff all across the city presumably only for it to just stay there long after everybody remembers we don’t gaf about soccer. this shit will haunt us like covid signs

bring back seafoam

at least 30% of my extrovert skills come from chatting my way into taking more than is reasonably polite at catered events

@marygaitspill do u remember the high end escort twitter accs in like 2022 that would have full academic resumes on them

a lot of you women are the "nerdy escort" who's valued not just "for your looks" but for your "intellect" and "ability to converse" in whatever non explicitly committal relationship dynamic or "situationship" that you've gotten yourselves into, you're just not being paid for it

@digitalfields Omg i was just there. Had a great hotdog. a few strangers joined our grill. def chilling

who wants to chill at dude chilling park

rn i’m trying to introduce her to smokedope2016

Sometimes i say things like “a fleeting connection doesn’t mean it’s insignificant” to my roommate

@weirdassfishes i like thatyoure not gatekeeping this

theres a kid at the mall foodcourt with a desktop computer(?)

modest mouse albums are not good anymore but autoplay reccomendations after r still great. why is this

i used to set my passwords to motivational phrases (eg iAMwinning100) ... theoretically nobody would know but i somehow cringed myself out and now i just set a series of characters that mean something so much more bland

your instagram sucks because you are either a) gatekeeping the best parts, or b) preserving the mundane to a degree of affectionate mediocrity

@miinifuture TAKEMEWITHYOUUU

going to smokedope alone and it’s on monday night after working 7-4 am i even gonna enjoy ts.