Jes

Did I accidentally shove a fistful of LSD up my arse or did this really happen?

NASA’s coffee cup, designed to not spill in zero gravity

Headless human bodies, infinitely cloned mice, schizophrenic crackheads, alien hybrid breeding programs, a vampire in Singapore, swords attached to drones, Kristi Noem’s cross-dressing husband, 200-year-old tortoise caught up in a crypto scam, Artemis II crew locked inside a big soda can, $23 million toilet breaks in fake space, two crows eat Rapunzel’s hair, Lindsey Graham drinks blood at Disney to celebrate war, 14-year-old runs for governor in Vermont, Gucci Mane kidnapped, influencer kidnapped herself at gunpoint, scientists plotting to kidnap asteroids, slaughterhouse theft rings on the rise because cow gallstones are worth more than gold, missing U.S. airman in Iran, F-35 crash in Nevada, flying saucer over Philadelphia, giant robots battle in Detroit, robot centaurs in China, portals to Waffle House, and they want to put pig semen in your eye to cure cancer—how was your week?

fuck scooter