Mr. Ted

Unaita light skin sleepover usiku anaanza kulia anataka mamake

Kitu najua time yako nayo ikifika imefika.

Sasa unafanyia nini Whatsapp na hakuna mtu mnaongea na yeye huko 😂

mahn kama kuna kitu inawaste time ya watu ni talking stage...

Nobody loves you more than a cheating girlfriend 😂

having money genuinely fixes like 70% of daily stress.

Nikikupigia simu niskie uko na skiza tune sitawahi kupigia tena

Sai ata uniambie unalala njaa wee lala tu hamlipi madeni

Before you text her, remember, there is another guy in her phone who doesn't have to text her first.

from a young age i knew i could do it alone

Kuishi na Dem while you're still broke inafaa kuwekwa Kwa 1000 ways to d!e

Lala kabisa na huteremki stairs ukienda kitchen

Behind every successful man there are lots of women he refused to send money.

Kusota nayo inaezakufanya uone kama ukona depression

Pretending not to notice people staring at you is such a skill.

You become unstoppable when you realize that you can do it alone 💪

Life is currently teaching me to be just as selfish as everyone else

If we start arguing and you're fat, just know you've already lost.

If a girl agrees to a meet up with you She’s already considering fucking you.

Dear men, having sex on an empty stomach helps you last longer..