iMama

Rain came, wind blew, my house was built on you I’m safe with you, I’m gonna make it through

So ashamed, I’ve got alot to do and vowed to get it all done on my day off, but I’ve done nothing but sleep all day

unfortunately scott was funny asf

it doesn’t surprise me when ppl make exceptions for me because i’ve always been exceptional

Real

I can't call someone stupid at work, so I say "walk me through your thought process".

My daughter (she’s 9) said “dad I’m a take you to top golf for your birthday we both never did it before.” I asked “you got enough saved to pay for it” She said “no you’re gonna pay when we go you’re my dad and a grown up.”

By the time a man start acting right, you already made peace with losing him.

i’m NEVER mean without reason. NEVER

once you sexualize our conversation, i’ll monetize it

goodbye $300 hello 3 groceries

Training my nervous system to choose an unfamiliar heaven instead of a familiar hell

“i don’t give a flying fuck” is funny as hell bc why the fuck flying

Beauty in black is one terrible show that I cannot stop watching.

I will pay for my convenience.. I don’t like stress😭😭😭

That’s what I’m talking about 👏

Unpopular opinion: doing absolutely nothing at work is more draining mentally than being busy at work.

walked into work and two people complimented my outfit back to back

me with you ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ me without u ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

@siimasoud Apite arende tu mambo mengi leo 🤣

@nonchalanceyy Not today please 🤣🤣🤣

😂😂 please