xerxes

I don’t celebrate April Fools Day. It’s just a conspiracy from Big Fool to get us dumber.

Now that I think about it why was his mother so scared that she moved him across the country to a different state over what he describes as a little playground fight.

@Pazza7 @chemda When I was younger I read his show

@notlife @chemda I would definitely be reading more literature if it’f been recommended by Will Smith’s book club

Why is anyone surprised that people are taking Will Smith's side. He can do no wrong. If Oprah dies one day he's next in line for the job.

Everyone who responds with physical assault is coming from a place of pain. It’s not kindness to make excuses for them. It’s kindness to give them the responsibility of their own thoughts and responses. #WeAllHavePain

Chemda opens a care package from her mother in Israel youtu.be/6zz-jNsEvp4 #KATG

The @keithandthegirl Kickstarter has launched! kickstarter.com/projects/katg/…

Iv been watching feelings movies and I know karate

Your guide to @KeithMalley and @chemda's pioneering podcast, Keith and the Girl. @cinemalins writes vult.re/3g3lw4J

Keith's kill list for this Saturday includes @courtmaginnis @MurfMeyer @dinahashem_ & @Subhah Get. Your. Tickets! KATG.com/TICKETS Watch Now: youtu.be/NGL2MldWS-Q #KATG #SilentTrailers

Guest starring …

Two years ago I checked into the hospital for my busted knee and @notlife (Xerxes) took me. That was our first date! Happy anniversary to my favorite person!

We're considering accepting @dogecoin as a payment option. RT this if you want this to happen. #DogeDay #dogecoin 🌜 New to us? We sell everything PC, tech, automotive, and more ► newegg.io/homepage

Watching Joker with @notlife

@KeithMalley we can fix that

Is there a service that makes a news article online (without all the ads and spacing and bullshit) printable? (You can’t just easily copy paste and delete bullshit. How the fuck do people read articles online?! Team Newspapers for life!)

Our show Silent Trailers is recommended by THE NEW YORK TIMES in their weekend round-up of 5 Things To Do This Weekend! Thank you @thecomicscomic pic by @andrewlipovsky Check it out: nyti.ms/3tAWm1F And get tickets to tomorrow's show: KATG.com/TICKETS

Today we celebrate 16 years of the Keith and The Girl podcast. Thank you! #keithandthegirl #katg #podcast #sweet16 #16thbirthday #nyc #lic #astoria

KATG 3376:Please Don’t Stop the Music w/ Pippa Mags, Matt B @notlife @Jessiejolles @silkyjumbo KATG.com/3376 -Chris D’elia’s attempted return -Xzibit and Krista divorce ⁠#keithandthegirl #nyc #comedy #katg #podcast #lol #LIC #BlackLivesMatter #icarealot #xzibit