⚪️Xine

Just so you know, I’m always up to chat about the gay crabs in Hey Duggee.

@afoxinlondon Thank you. And the same to you. I’m absolutely fine and dandy. Bit of surgery and all is well.

@notlikeparis I listened to your show as I cooked. Look after yourself please. Be well.

Me and Doug (the artist formerly known as @das_munch) recorded a new podcast pilot last week. It’s got some gnarly audio bleed (Doug’s fault) which we’re fixing and it’s rough as fuck but please feel free to have a listen and let me know what you think. drive.google.com/file/d/1PRWZlf…

@afoxinlondon She’s pretty good

@notlikeparis I’ve just realised how sad I actually am. I was really excited to understand one of your sources without having to look it up. Never seen her in anything but that’s a class issue.

@afoxinlondon Once Jodie Comer does your accent, you know you’ve made it as a people.

@notlikeparis Now I’ve looked to the reference I’m sure I’d agree.

@afoxinlondon Hello Alex! I do! Possibly more so, in order to look cool in the wake of 28 Years Later.

@notlikeparis You still sound northern. I thought you may have fixed that by now :)

@RupertLowe10 Are you suggesting we ban the great British tradition of the Christmas pantomime? It’s literally drag aimed at children. I’d love to hear all the ways that beloved actors in a frock have caused irreparable damage to our society.

I just want my country back. A country we can once again be proud to call home. Where children aren’t sacrificed to Pakistani rapists. Where our border actually means something. Where foreign rapists are deported, not handed council flats and legal aid. Where you can speak your mind, without fear of being cancelled, sacked or even arrested. Where the truth matters more than someone's feelings. Where the British flag is flown proudly. Where we grow our own food, actually make our own stuff, and stand on our own two feet. Where men are men, women are women, and everyone knows the difference. Where people earn their keep, not indolently live off the system by choice. Where a GP appointment doesn’t take six weeks. Where we unapologetically kick out foreign criminals. Where success is celebrated, not punished with taxes and scorn. Where the trains can sometimes run on time. Where we don't have drag shows in primary schools. Where the rule of law actually means something, and the same rules apply to everyone. Where young British couples feel able to raise a family. Where we celebrate the trades and apprenticeships. Where the criminal justice system can't be weaponised for foul ends. Where we make things, fix things, and own things. Where a young mum isn't in prison for posting something stupid on social media. Where people can actually speak English (mad idea, I know). Where loyalty to Britain comes first - not Palestine, but Britain. Where offence isn't outlawed. Where veterans are housed before illegal migrants. Where our Christian values are celebrated. Where we remember who we are. Where we're proud of what we are. Where we can proudly call home. I don’t think that’s too much to ask, do you? I just want my country back.

@WickedestWoods @FrankOctopus Good point 😆

@notlikeparis @FrankOctopus WHAT ABOUT ME?!? And the fact that you said on the Podcast that my tw*t was a tw*tmagnet. Oh how that is not true now! 😜

@FrankOctopus Me and Doug are getting the band back together. Another bang average podcast is on its way. As our biggest (only) fan, we thought you should know.

@FrankOctopus We’re going on an exchange trip! Doug and I are swapping cultural experiences that at important to each of us.

@notlikeparis Awesome. Can I ask the subject matter?

@history99917180 My dad wasn’t convinced that I was traumatised enough by this so followed it up with The Plague Dogs.

People getting upset about the tv programme ‘Adolescence’ being shown in schools. F’ck me people. They made my generation watch this horror movie. I still haven’t watched it again after 45 years. It still makes me cry.

@Lpowell588Lady @jeffnoon @angryrobotbooks Likewise! Although I’m not terribly active on here these days so I’m a bit of a crap follow! 🤣

@notlikeparis @jeffnoon @angryrobotbooks i am delighted to follow anyone who reads jeff noon. 😍

Gogmagog and Ludluda chart the journey of a boat through the sixty-mile long ghost of a dragon. Check them out now, from @angryrobotbooks

Going to re-live my youth so bloody hard. musicglue.com/pop-recs-ltd/e…

@afoxinlondon There’s too many of them.

@notlikeparis But then you’ll miss out on so many people making complete fools of themselves.

The comments on this post are why I no longer enjoy Twitter. Do you remember when people used to enjoy satire on here?

@anguaji Marra

Right, I think it's time we Geordies think up a cosy colloquialism for the enbies in our lives. This has tripped me up a few times over the summer because "lass" and "lad" comes out so easily but then what do I use when I'm teasing my enbies, but still want to remain regional?

@das_munch And the mighty Craig Parkinson playing Basil Exposition: a depressing waste of talent.

@das_munch Dear god. It even had a Dead Wife. Who came back! Sort of! Tosh and balls, my friend.

@das_munch THANK YOU. I grumbled all through it but Richard insisted on watching.