Lungs Afterborn 🫁 🩸18+

me after reading the nastiest smut fic known to man as a bedtime story

-1 grandparent

@isaac_saas Damn them being a woman surprised me

We listed our old house for rent 3 days ago. This morning I got my first ever call from a potential tenant. My very first one. I wish I was joking. "Hi, I have a couple questions about your listing." "Ok, fire away..." "I have an ongoing medical malpractice case and was wondering if it was okay if I pay the whole year up front because I'm not working." "Umm.. yeah, I think that would be ok? I don't see why not... I'm guessing that's why you're not working? If it's confidential, that's fine, just curious..." "Yeah, that's why... it has to do with my foot and I can't work." "Ok, what other questions do you have?" "Do you have any dog restrictions? We have a 10 year old pitbull... she's my childhood dog... she's so sweet... never had any issues with her." "Ummm... I think the HOA has restrictions on that breed." (Idk if they do, I just made that up) "Ok, just let me know. Next question. I do have a felony on my record for vehicular manslaughter. The person survived and ended up with only a broken collarbone... and umm... my dad would be living with me, he's my caregiver, he also has a felony on his record but he already did his time. It was his first felony and will be his last felonly." "Umm..." "Yeah... I know it's a lot going on but I don't have any evictions or anything... but I did break a lease when I was 18 because I'm a single mom and well, um... some things we're going on and I was just in mommy mode... but I'm about to pay all that off once I get this medical malpractice money." "Umm... we have a few other applications we're going to review and I'll get back to you." I think I'm going to sell the house.

this is what chat gtp users look like to me

@owomoxcx Man is wearing pink

why would you rip it down the middle vertically girl you just made 2 smaller pride flags

@Argenpoirot WHO picked Hawaii

Hicieron una CONFERENCIA DE DERMATOLOGIA en HAWAII. Las imágenes son épicas 🌞

@rahsh33m I used to eat those potatoes out the can as a child

I know she LYINGGGGGGG 🙃

Let's dance with mom

Lil guy looks so stupid I love it.

Me if you care

what fucking survey are you taking brother

@rabidlungs It just keeps slipping out im sorry

They caught me lacking AGAIN

A Palm Springs animal shelter has been treating a kitten named Zoe who was found appearing inflated like a balloon.

@kitavtuber me to you

Has anyone here ever had a friend block them because they were bad at a game? Do people take the game that serious?

I hold a loaded gun and in it are the phrases 'any askers' and 'didnt ask'. I have never been strong enough to pull the trigger.

@Nephilmblood @ReddCinema Ew

@rabidlungs @ReddCinema How many humans do you talk to in a day even if you didn't want to? Any one of them could have decided to kill you. Humans are also animals after all. We do all the same things eat sleep reproduce..die only difference is we have to work for our wants and needs.

Gorillas are so funny bc why did she roll down the hill just to beat his ass

Everything is Embarrassing

@Ressniee I feel like everyone that gets scared in minecraft presses q lol

I installed a Minecraft mod that gives me a 1/10000 chance to get jumpscared by Foxy from FNAF and today it happened. The topic of discussion was very interesting-

@camliekr Uh oh

updated version