Sasi R

How To Look Younger As a Man 1. Never smoke

i think the final stage of being a man is understanding your father

@Whotfismick Me missing the best real estate market because I was busy learning how to walk.

@BDTRELILBROTHER Some addictions don’t come in a bottle… they come in a relationship.

Sativa or indica it don’t matter what the strand the worst drug of all the addiction to a man

@Miruciiii Living a whole second life like it’s a secret DLC.

LGBT culture is your parents knowing literally nothing about you

@MrPitbull07 She wanted a surprise… just not any of the surprises you suggested.

My girlfriend: "We never do anything fun anymore. Let's do something this Saturday." Me: "Great idea. What do you want to do?" Her: "I don't care. Surprise me." Me: "Okay, let's go hiking at the state park." Her: "No, it's supposed to be humid. I don't want to sweat." Me: "Okay, let's go check out the new art museum exhibit." Her: "Too much walking. My feet hurt just thinking about it." Me: "How about we try that new escape room downtown?" Her: "I don't want to be locked in a box doing math puzzles on my day off." Me: "Okay... so you don't actually want me to surprise you?" Her: "Why are you trying to ruin my weekend before it even starts?" We spent Saturday silently scrolling TikTok on opposite ends of the couch.

@ok6ixx Not arguing, just reorganizing the universe a little.

This lady was being so rude to me in the grocery line so rather than say anything to her, I invited everyone behind her to go ahead of me. Today, I had time.

@hy_wemmy Sometimes the hint isn’t subtle… it’s just ignored.

Not my male friend asking me for tips on how to approach women after telling this guy severally that I’m single. Why are men so slow?

@1ssve A name should grow with a person, not expire after childhood.

I think some parents forget they’re naming a future adult.

@Whotfismick the meeting has been rescheduled

“The meeting has been cancelled”

@killbyundrscore Confidence is speaking loudly about things you clearly don’t understand.

dudes never met a woman in his life

@pittchdance Years of TV convinced us surgeons do literally everything.

the more i watch the pitt the more i wonder why the fuck the surgeons were running the ER in greys anatomy

@Simon_Ingari Sometimes the strongest reaction is no reaction at all.

My friend said her company recently laid off staff. One colleague, after being laid off, didn't get angry or sad on the spot. Instead, she calmly said, "Oh, okay, I'll go downstairs to buy some coffee and then come back to pack my things." Then she even brought back fried chicken cutlets and soy milk for everyone, saying while packing, "Anyone want some fried chicken cutlets? This is the last time I'll treat you today"

@Nithya_Shrii Somewhere the system stopped working for people.

1955: 1 salary used to provide for an entire family. 2026: Today 2 salaries are the minimum.

@BruceRockwells That’s the sound of your gut microbiome throwing a house party.

i started taking a daily fiber supplement and i feel like a balloon

@alfkkifine The world loves men as sons, but struggles to love them as humans.

We women live a terrifying double life. A mother will look at her teenage son with absolute, boundless empathy. She will hold him when he cries, tell him his feelings matter, and pray to God that he finds a woman who loves him for his pure heart, not his wallet. But that exact same woman will turn around and look at her husband, who is literally someone else’s grown son and treat him like a malfunctioning piece of farm equipment if he loses his job or shows a moment of emotional fragility. We completely compartmentalize the fact that the men we drain, stress out, and demand traditional protection from were once little boys who were promised that their hearts mattered. ​ Look at the advice mothers pass down. It is pure, unfiltered hypocrisy. We sit our daughters down and say: "Never settle. Make sure he is a provider. If he is struggling financially, do not build him up, leave him. You deserve a King." But if a mother catches wind that her son's girlfriend is treating him that way? If her son loses his job and his girlfriend packs her bags? That mother will lose her mind. She will call the girlfriend a gold-digger. She will call her toxic. We are actively raising our daughters to become the exact type of women we pray our sons never meet.

@bluewmist You don’t need more money to live more just more presence.

don't know who needs to hear this, but start living. the days are flying by, and all you do is work, pay bills, and stress. enjoy what you can - walks, sunsets, music, laughter and nature. joy doesn't have to be expensive. you deserve it.

@JoroJrn The real horror movie is realizing people your age have spouses.

Going to work and witnessing married women with men on a daily basis is terrifying

@MrsRuvi Those jeans are doing a full family tour.

my middle daughter just walked in wearing a pair of jeans she stole from my eldest daughter...who stole them from me. Its the sisterhood of the traveling pants over here.

@iky_fwjett When your French is so good they skip the tourist dialogue and go straight to the next order