DarkStardust doesn't post much here anymore

Hosting Christmas this year and lacking an old git? Get yourself 15% off a new one! #eBayDeals

Top notch comedy (3 high end headline acts & an MC who’ll muddle through as best he can) plus live music until 2am. Not a bad way to spend a very competitively priced New Year’s Eve. I NEVER work NYE & only am because @53two has made it too good to miss: ticketsource.co.uk/53two/t-xmljqde

@drphiliplee1 The risk of reproduction resulting in death could be considered a design flaw. [Psst - wreak]

Spoken like a person who hasn't witnessed the horrors the human body will decide to wrought on itself for no apparent reason.

@thedavideagle Better not fall apart while you're not slandering anyone, then.

Just discovered that my liability insurance for the Edinburgh Fringe doesn’t cover me if the show includes acrobatics, fire, inflatable structures, knife throwing, deformation or abuse. So that’s me buggered. I’m just going to have to do jokes, songs and stories. How boring.

@watsoncomedian @lottelydia For me it's the bigger than/smaller than symbols. I *know* it involves crocodiles and is very simple but brain no worky.

@lottelydia Exactly this. My brain gratefully accepts the explanation, wipes it, we go again, forever. Similar thing when people explain the principles of how electricity works in any detail.

Objectively I do know the difference between gross and net, I’ve been around a while; in practice, every time someone uses these terms to me, my brain reacts as if they were just shouting LAWNMOWER over and over again.

@watsoncomedian You can only take home what you've caught in your net.

Sharks off Brazil coast test positive for cocaine bbc.co.uk/news/articles/… #HeadlinesThatSoundLikeCrypticCrosswordClues

Researchers appeal to send 1,000 slugs by post bbc.co.uk/news/articles/… @Cavalorn #HeadlinesThatSoundLikeCrypticCrosswordClues

Tomorrow the struggle for a fairer, greener country will resume. But today? Rejoice. Just fucking rejoice.

I like Twitter today. It feels like we’re all on a massive sofa together, eating crisps and watching those fuckers fall apart in real time 👌

@Joannechocolat It looks pretty good from here! Happy birthday.

This is what 60 looks like.... 😂🎂🎶

@mrmarksteel Happy birthday!

No better way to spend a birthday

@hurricane_ros 😄

oh God while also wearing a t-shirt with MILF on it in massive letters.

Marking the end of Tory rule with a Greggs sausage roll from a train station I ran into to escape torrential rain. 🫡🇬🇧

Frost flowers on frozen water

@backstreet74 The New Pornographers - High Ticket Attractions

Can anyone think of a song with the word Faction in the lyrics? (Ignore last post !)

Cats.. 😂

@hierath77 OMFG 💃👗🌮🍯🎆

@Ana34889825 @EmmaTolkin Have you been sniffing feminists' vaginas again?

@EmmaTolkin I hope it doesn't smell like the feminist vaginas.

LOOK CLOSER AT THE DRESS I IMPLORE YOU TO ZOOM IN ON THE FUCKING DRESS

Complaining that a boardgame is a waste of time is like complaining that a poem is an inefficient way of ordering a sandwich. You're technically correct, but you're also missing the point. Both activities carve out a refuge from the tyranny of utility.