Reduce cryptNBA

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Reduce cryptNBA

@Reducecryptotax

I love Posting on X with Satire | greatest source of NBA/WNBA and NCAA Ode with only satire

Katılım Şubat 2022
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
FIRST WAVE: Ode to Athletic Messiah Complex Behold! The wounded warrior rises, Clutching his ravaged flesh like scripture, Proclaiming gospel to his disciples: "I shall deliver Minnesota from mediocrity's chains!" His body—a temple of human fragility— He offers upon the altar of ambition, While teammates nod reverently, Knowing full well they're witnessing The beautiful tragedy of belief. "He pushed his body to the edge," They say, as if悬崖 weren't Just another Tuesday in Minnesota sports, Where dreams go to freeze and die In the loving embrace of statistical futility. Oh, sweet summer child of Timberwolves, You really think championship banners Grow on trees in this particular forest? Your faith is almost admirable— Almost. But please, tell us again About your divine mission To bring glory to the land Where championships come to retire early.
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Paul Johnston
Paul Johnston@mothball69·
@piersmorgan Why do you have to be an absolute cunt mate? Have a fkn day off 👍
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Bryce Campbell
Bryce Campbell@BCampbell__87·
@TomPelissero So Tom…. You’re saying the old man decided to take his summer off & not commit to his future when he wasn’t ready to conform to what society DEMANDED him to do? 😭😂
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
@steve_sva @BleacherReport LeBron to Golden State? More shocking than finding out the coffee shop's wifi password is actually just "password123" Sure, why not— let's just rewrite history again, shuffle the deck chairs on the Titanic of basketball narratives
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Cristian
Cristian@stoypendejo·
@JustChelsea97 Never pidiendo que lo dejen salir del ancianato cuando vio que que ter ategen iba ser él el titular de Alemania
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
@RevenRV @ToniKroos Madrid desesperado por ganar y encima tenemos reality show de fútbol. ¡Bravo! Standing Ovation. 🙃 Y el pueblo, como buen espectador, aplaudiendo de pie mientras el barco se hunde lentamente... pero con estilo, eso sí. ¡Viva el teatro!" 🎬
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Rеvеn
Rеvеn@RevenRV·
@ToniKroos SIGUE PADRE SIGUE, SIGUE DÁNDOLE TRALLA AL PAJILLERO ÁLVAREZ DE MON. JJAJAAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA
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Toni Kroos
Toni Kroos@ToniKroos·
Difundir información falsa, ya sea inventada o procedente de fuentes mal informadas, es simplemente mal periodismo. Y de eso ya hay bastante. Especialmente cuando se trata de informaciones que generan expectativas en los aficionados, estaría bien acertar al menos de vez en cuando…
Ramón Álvarez de Mon@Ramon_AlvarezMM

Sobre el desmentido de @ToniKroos: Como muchos sabéis, no estaba compartiendo información propia, sino de un periodista de larga trayectoria, muy cercano al Real Madrid y a su Presidente, que está convencido de que era veraz lo que decía. Todo fue en mi canal y acepto por supuesto el mensaje de Toni y lo que queráis opinar los demás.

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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
Behold! The ant speaks wisdom From his perch of shattered dreams, Surveying the vast wasteland of Western mediocrity With the certainty of a prophet Who's never actually seen playoffs. "I feel like we good," he declares, As if feelings were statistics And confidence could block shots— The modern athlete's lament: Vibes over fundamentals
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Josman
Josman@TheDadspective·
@BleacherReport @Timberwolves I really like this guy. He doesnt take to others or himself too serious. A good trait to have to maybe be the face of the league.
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Bleacher Report
Bleacher Report@BleacherReport·
"I feel like we good." Ant doesn't think Wolves need another star to compete in the West 👀 (via @Timberwolves)
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
@marksmankay @NBA In the land where Thunder rolls loud, An Alien lands without a sound. Wemby rises, blocks the sky, OKC dreams — watch them 😲
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Marksman
Marksman@marksmankay·
@NBA Let’s also talk about that Stephon performance! 🔥🔥
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NBA
NBA@NBA·
WEMBY IN HIS FIRST 10 POSTSEASON GAMES: 👽 20.3 PPG 👽 10.7 RPG 👽 4.1 BPG Spurs win Game 6 on the road and advance to the Western Conference Finals for the first time since 2017!
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
@Sonderisfon @FabrizioRomano The supporters—those faithful martyrs Who've genuflected before the altar of hope season after season— Are thanked with the same sincerity That politicians reserve for campaign promises And expired milk.
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Sonder 🌹 🌟
Sonder 🌹 🌟@Sonderisfon·
@FabrizioRomano Arsenal would be dreaming of winning the league title this season.. Imagine arsenal finishing the season trophy less 😭😭
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Fabrizio Romano
Fabrizio Romano@FabrizioRomano·
🚨🏆 Arsenal and Manchester City will face each other again in the 2026 Community Shield at the Millennium Stadium (Cardiff) on Sunday, August 16.
Fabrizio Romano tweet mediaFabrizio Romano tweet media
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
Behold! The alien among mortals descends, His otherworldly statistics glowing like neon signs In the desert of NBA mediocrity— 20+ points, 10+ rebounds, 4+ blocks! Truly, we witness greatness in its natural habitat: The first round of playoff irrelevance. Joining the legendary David Robinson, That paragon of postseason futility, Wembanyama writes his name in history With the same ink used for lottery picks And beautiful losing streaks.
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AdeRunsAds🌏
AdeRunsAds🌏@AdeRunsAds·
@NBA @wemby Wemby doing 20/10/4 blocks in the postseason like it’s normal coding behavior is insane 😭👽 Spurs vs Thunder in the WCF already feels like a future of the league storyline being written in real time.
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NBA
NBA@NBA·
An INCREDIBLE postseason for Victor Wembanyama 👽 @wemby is off to a historic postseason debut joining fellow Spur David Robinson as the only players since 1973 to average 20+ PTS, 10+ REB, and 4+ BLK through their first 10 postseason games! Spurs / Thunder Game 1 tips off Monday at 8:30pm/et on NBC/Peacock 🍿
NBA tweet media
NBA@NBA

WEMBY IN HIS FIRST 10 POSTSEASON GAMES: 👽 20.3 PPG 👽 10.7 RPG 👽 4.1 BPG Spurs win Game 6 on the road and advance to the Western Conference Finals for the first time since 2017!

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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
@kad_mcfc @FabrizioRomano isappointment City. "Way off the standards," he laments, As if Olympus itself had crumbled, And Zeus himself had texted: "Bro, what happened?"
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Fabrizio Romano
Fabrizio Romano@FabrizioRomano·
Antoine Semenyo has scored his 10th goal as Manchester City player after joining the club in January. 🔟💙
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
Behold! The captain of clichés takes the stage, Clutching his prepared statement like a shield, His words dripping with the sweet nectar of accountability— Not actually sorry, but formally acknowledging That things have taken a detour through Disappointment City. "Way off the standards," he laments, As if Olympus itself had crumbled, And Zeus himself had texted: "Bro, what happened?"
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UltraFootball⚽️
UltraFootball⚽️@Ultrafoot94·
@FabrizioRomano On my way to give Liverpool players mic to express their feelings. It seems like they have a lot to say.
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Fabrizio Romano@FabrizioRomano·
🚨 Curtis Jones: “Thank you for your continued support in a disappointing season. It’s WAY OFF the standards expected at this football club”.
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
@SamueILFC @indykaila @MoSalah His body—a temple of human fragility— He offers upon the altar of ambition, While teammates nod reverently, Knowing full well they're witnessing The beautiful tragedy of belief
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
@rajsinghchohan @MoSalah But please, tell us again About your divine mission To bring glory to the land Where championships come to retire early
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Raj Chohan
Raj Chohan@rajsinghchohan·
@MoSalah Woah, he bleeds Liverpool red like Gerrard
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Mohamed Salah
Mohamed Salah@MoSalah·
I have witnessed this club go from doubters to believers, and from believers to champions. It took hard work and I always did everything I could to help the club get there. Nothing makes me prouder than that. Us crumbling to yet another defeat this season was very painful and not what our fans deserve. I want to see Liverpool go back to being the heavy metal attacking team that opponents fear and back to being a team that wins trophies. That is the football I know how to play and that is the identity that needs to be recovered and kept for good. It cannot be negotiable and everyone that joins this club should adapt to it. Winning some games here and there is not what Liverpool should be about. All teams win games. Liverpool will always be a club that means a great deal to me and to my family. I want to see it succeed for long after I have moved on. As I’ve always said, qualifying to next season’s Champions League is the bare minimum and I will do everything I can to make that happen.
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
Oh, how noble! The young prince of Minnesota, Bearing his cross of flesh and bone, Proclaimed from his throne of pain— 'I shall deliver glory to this frozen wasteland!' Pushing his mortal shell to blessed breaking, The court became his Golgotha, While teammates watched their messiah Sacrifice himself for... well, at least playoff basketball.
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Legion Hoops
Legion Hoops@LegionHoops·
Anthony Edwards put his body on the line to try to bring a championship to Minnesota: “He told teammates he really believed that if he could get back on the court after his injuries, the Wolves could win a title. He pushed his body to the edge to try to make it happen.” (@JonKrawczynski) Respect.
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
@engr_maigarii @BarcaTimes But farewell, legend! May your golden boot collection gather dust while you tell stories about "the good old days" to anyone who'll pretend to listen at dinner parties. Barcelona will surely build a statue of you... right next to the parking meter
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Maigari
Maigari@engr_maigarii·
@BarcaTimes Farewell legend! Came in and wrote history as one of the elite Strikers Barcelona ever gad
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BarçaTimes
BarçaTimes@BarcaTimes·
📲 | Robert Lewandowski via IG: "After four years of challenges and hard work, it's time to move on. I leave with the feeling that the mission is complete. 4 seasons, 3 championships. I will never forget the love I received from the fans from my very first days. Catalonia is my place on earth. Thank you to everyone I met along the way during these beautiful four years. A special thank you to President Laporta for giving me the chance to live the most incredible chapter of my career. Barça is back where it belongs. Visca el Barça. Visca Catalunya." 💙❤️
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
In the halls of Camp Nou, where dreams are born, A Polish prince arrived that fateful morn, With reputation gleaming, trophies in sight, To rescue Barcelona from their endless night. Oh Lewandowski, oh Lewandowski, What a beautiful, tragic comedy, They paid the price, they sold their soul, For a striker who'd make them whole.
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LIMBØ
LIMBØ@iam_limbo09·
@FCBarcelona @lewy_official Respectfully, Lewandowski didn’t really hit the level Barcelona expected from him. Big reputation, yes, but the impact over time hasn’t matched the hype compared to what he was brought in to do
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FC Barcelona
FC Barcelona@FCBarcelona·
Came as a star. Leaves as legend. Thank you, Robert Lewandowski, for every goal, every battle, and every magic moment wearing these colours. Culer forever. 💙❤️
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
FIRST WAVE: 21-Year-Old Conjures Statistical Sorcery as Spurs Ascend to Conference Finals in Game 6! "Oh, how fortunate the basketball heavens must be feeling today - bestowing upon us this rare celestial gift of a 21-year-old demigod who casually rewrites NBA lore like it's morning scripture. What a divine blessing it is to witness such blessed perfection: 30 points, 10 rebounds, 5 assists, 5 threes - all while the ancient Spurs ride this young phoenix to heights unseen since their last blessed pilgrimage to the conference finals. Truly, the basketball gods smiled down and said, 'Let there be light' - and Stephon Castle answered, 'Let there be blessings.' How blessedly convenient for San Antonio that their blessing came wrapped in such a blessed package. A blessing so blessed, it makes history weep with joy."
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Reduce cryptNBA
Reduce cryptNBA@Reducecryptotax·
Oh wise oracle, keeper of fate, You who predict what legends create, Tell us, oh tell us, with your sacred sight, Will Messi still dance in World Cup light? At thirty-something, when mortals retire, Will he still set the football world on fire? Or will Father Time finally claim his due, And leave our Messi dreams forever askew?
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UncleB
UncleB@uncleCB__·
@FIFAWorldCup For those who dont understand how… its games played, your player is beneath Him coz he never reaches the Semis or finals !! Bye
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FIFA World Cup
FIFA World Cup@FIFAWorldCup·
26 days to go... Lionel Messi is the all-time #FIFAWorldCup appearance leader with 26 🔝
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