JackpotRob

I'm giving out my own #tube_chat badges for 'normal' grumpy commuters @ThePoke

@tomwookieford @sniffpetrol @timoldland Paris-Dakar stylee?!

@sniffpetrol @timoldland Hmmm.

After yesterday's Spring wheels debate, here are rough mock ups of a couple of options. Bronze to match the mirrors or green to match the bodywork. Either way, the excellent @timoldland has offered to 3D print some centre caps to make everything look tidier. So that's nice.

@WoodmanGav Are all the other 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 Dads at chai tea classes?

See all you other dads at the Thai Chi classes, looking forward to it.

Here’s a Mexican handbag for you @RadioX @WoodmanGav @SuntaTempleton @Johnnyvaughan The old Croydon Piano: quite simply, a fruit machine

The old Preston plot is the triangular shaped piece of land that just can’t be sold on a new housing estate despite such words as ‘quirky’ or ‘unique opportunity’ being used as sales bait @RadioX @WoodmanGav @SuntaTempleton

@APartridgeQOTD “Dyer consequences” - Danny Dyer hosts a tv panel show where the guests must take it in turns to choose squares on a big screen, behind which lurk a selection of consequences for them to face. It must not, I repeat not, turn into series of bawdy sex scenes.

Idea for a Programme competition is now underway👌 Reply directly to this tweet with your best 'Idea for a Programme'. The reply with the most likes and retweets (combined), at the end of this week is our winner - let battle commence and please keep it clean👌

@APartridgeQOTD “It’s all gravy” - So Solid rapper ‘Romeo’ opens a pie and mash shop in Wigan

@APartridgeQOTD “Tie Di” - a Thai lady called Diana, affectionately known as “Di” to her family, runs a tie-dye stall in Totnes Saturday market.

@Scalextric Done

🏁 WIN the ultimate motorsport evening with Team Hill at PalmerSport! 🏁 We’ve teamed up with Jake Hill to give away a ticket to the Team Hill PalmerSport Track Day — happening Thursday 29th May at the Bedford Autodrome. What’s Included: ➡️ Drive the Palmer JP-LM Sports Prototype, F3000 Single-Seater, Sodi Racing Kart and a Ginetta G56 GT Car! ➡️Passenger ride with BTCC champion Jake Hill ➡️ All sessions are timed and competitive, with pro race instructors pushing you to your limit ➡️ BBQ, prizegiving and maybe even a post-race pint! All you have to do to enter is 1) Follow @scalextric 2) Re-share this post 3) Reply ‘Done’ Head over to our Facebook and Instagram pages for additional entries and don’t forget to share with your friends and family! Entries close on Monday 26th May at 11:59 PM. This competition is not affiliated with X. Full T&Cs can be found on the Scalextric website. T&Cs and info: -Age 21+ with at least 12 months full UK driving licence -Height: 5’0” to 6’5” -Max weight: 18 stone / 115kg -Travel not included -Event held at Bedford Autodrome. Thursday 29th 3:45pm - 8:30pm. -Dietary requirements for BBQ can be catered for. -All gear provided (helmets & boots), but feel free to bring your own

The old Aruba crab is that goal keeper who shuffles from side to side in an effort to put off the oppositions penalty taker @RadioX @WoodmanGav @SuntaTempleton

The old Moroccan taco is any bbq food served to you in a napkin because there are no plates left @RadioX @WoodmanGav

The old Brisbane beret is when you drape your t-shirt over your head at the beach for when it’s getting a tad hot out there under the midday sun @RadioX @WoodmanGav @SuntaTempleton

The old Brisbane beret is quite simply a bowl haircut @RadioX @WoodmanGav @SuntaTempleton

I heard that Little Si wears glasses for his perfect vision and also wears deaf-aids for his perfect hearing…pass it on… @RadioX @WoodmanGav @SuntaTempleton

@Scalextric Done

This is it—the grand finale! One lucky winner will take home the incredible Scalextric ARC PRO - Pro Platinum GT, worth £700! 🏎️🔥 With advanced features, cutting-edge technology, and everything you need for the ultimate racing experience, this is the crown jewel for Scalextric enthusiasts. All you have to do to enter is 1) Follow @scalextric 2) Reshare this post 3) Reply ‘done’ Head over to our Facebook and Instagram pages for additional entries and don’t forget to share with your friends and family! Entries close on 31st December at 11:59 PM. This competition is not affiliated with X. Full T&Cs can be found on the Scalextric website.

The old Scotch leg is quite simply a walking stick @RadioX @WoodmanGav @SuntaTempleton

The old Scotch leg is what happens to you when you drink in a pub all day and feel totally sober, until that moment you stand up and they give way beneath you @RadioX @WoodmanGav @SuntaTempleton

The ‘ole Catelonian click is the noise your knees make when get up from anything once you’re over 30 @RadioX @SuntaTempleton @WoodmanGav

The ‘ole Catelonian click is the noise you make to the waiting staff (normally with an extra wink) to gain their attention @RadioX @SuntaTempleton @WoodmanGav