Sara

A man complained to a psychiatrist: "Every time I take my driver's license exam, I worry so much, doctor. After many years, I still haven't been able to cure it." The doctor gently comforted: - Things will stabilize. Just stay calm, you will eventually pass your driving test. The man shook his head: – I have had a driver's license for decades. The doctor was surprised: – So what are you worried about? The man sighed: – The story is that I am a driving test examiner.

A man entered a barber's shop with a boy of five or six years of age holding his hand. He was in a great hurry and he asked the barber to cut his hair first and later to cut the boy's hair.

I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in, talking in an interesting accent. So I said, “Cool accent, are you two ladies from Ireland?” One of them snarled at me, “It’s Wales dumbo!” So I corrected myself, “Oh, right, so are you two whales from Ireland?” That’s about as far as I remember.

"Since he lost his money, half his friends don't know him any more"  "And the other half ?"  "They don't know yet that has lost it"

The Top Bunk He and his brother slept in a bunk bed. He had the bottom bunk. His brother had the top bunk. The top bunk had a guard rail. The rail kept the sleeper safe. His brother didn't like the rail. He always left it down. One time his brother fell out of the top bunk. He hit the carpet and woke up. He said, "Ouch!" Then he climbed back into the top bunk. When he woke up the next day, his back was sore. Mom took him to see the doctor. The doctor examined him. The doctor said he was okay. He said to keep the guard rail up. His brother said he would do that. That night his brother climbed into the top bunk again. He left the guard rail down. He said the guard rail was like jail. He didn't want to feel like he was in jail. He fell asleep. Then he fell out of the top bunk again.

One day a fox spied a beautiful bunch of ripe grapes hanging from a vine along the branches of a tree. The grapes seemed ready to burst with juice, and the fox’s mouth watered as he gazed longingly at them. The bunch hung from a high branch, and the fox had to jump for it. The first time he jumped he missed it by a long way. So he walked off a short distance and took a running leap, only to fall short once more. Again and again he tried, but in vain. Then he sat down and looked at the grapes in disgust. “What a fool I am”, he said. “Here I am wearing myself out to get a bunch of sour grapes that are not worth my time”. And off he walked very, very scornfully.

Three guys stranded on a desert island find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says: “I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here.”

Traffic police stopped a car that was moving like an arrow on the road. The driver explained: – Sir, I can explain. – No explanation, follow me to the station. – But I just want to say… - Do not talk anything. Go to the station and wait for the police chief. - But… – No buts. If you talk any more, I'll throw you in jail. Three hours later, the policeman returned and said to the guy: – Luckily for you, your boss is busy with his daughter's wedding today, he will definitely be happy to come back. – Don't dream, I am the groom of that wedding.

A thief entered the house of a young couple, hid in the cupboard, waiting for an opportunity. In the dark night I heard a rustling sound and my wife's voice whispered: "Where is it?" – Here, here! – Husband's English. – Lying on top? – Sister-in-law's voice. I'm so worried about the thief, he and his wife probably know I'm lying in this cupboard. While thinking about how to remove it, suddenly the excited wife cried out: – Are you happy? Are you happy? I was so scared, I begged profusely: – Dear grandmother, please forgive both of you, I will come down now!

The teacher walk to the class. Clothes are disheveled. Sunken face. The whole class was worried. Entering the classroom door, the teacher pulled out his right sandal and threw it flying to the left corner of the classroom. The whole class was scared. He pulls the left sandal and throw it. The scandel flew back to the classroom corner. The whole class trembled. Approaching the board, the teacher asked: - So, girls, are you scared, huh? - Teacher... I'm afraid, very afraid. - The whole class said in unison. - That's still not as scary as the second world war. Students take out pens and notebooks to study the new lesson: "The Second World War"

Not liking someone’s shoes can get you banned on here.

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Sometimes the people with the worst past ,create the best future

nerobím to kvôli peniazom len pre dobr? pocit

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful,

I ,m much more experience to sale and patches and I m all rounder and

to making a positive impact in the world.

Former actuary, at-home mom, wife, math tutor, kickboxer, joined to follow PDJT, love

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