Steve Schlafman

Haven't posted here since March. Almost 10 months. I'm slowly returning and assessing how I want to show up in these feeds. But here's my fuller update. I'm currently in a season of radical simplification. Editing. Refining. Slowing way down in some ways and speeding up in others. In June, I made the difficult decision to stop running Downshift, the 10-week decelerator program I'd been running. We brought 36 founders, execs and creatives through it. People left with more clarity about what mattered and more permission to let go of what didn't. But I just didn't have it in me to try to scale it. Ironically, I had to downshift from Downshift. Over the summer, I took my first sabbatical since I walked away from VC. While I was in Portugal, something cracked open. I guess you could call it a spiritual opening. What followed was about two months of walking around in what I can only call a bliss state. Feeling connected to something much larger than myself. I'm still integrating and honoring what I experienced even though my feet are firmly planted on the ground again. I'm learning to hold both. The felt sense of something vast and mysterious alongside the dishes, the deadlines, the ordinary Tuesday. Right now, my attention is moving in four directions: 1. Coaching. I'm loving this and in so much flow. My practice is full. Supporting my clients navigating inflection points is becoming more and more nourishing. I've rebuilt my practice from the ground up. December will be my biggest month ever. I can't believe I get to do this work and get paid for it. So grateful for my clients. 2. Hakomi. Wrapping up year one of a 3-4 year certification with the Hakomi Institute. Hakomi is a body-centered, mindfulness-based approach to psychotherapy. You slow down, turn toward the body, and listen for what's already there. It's radically changing how I attune and hold space for everyone in my life, including all the parts of myself. 3. Buddhist study. Working with a Zen teacher whose wisdom is helping me deepen into the dharma and Theravada philosophy. I'm spending the next 12 months studying the Path of Individual Liberation by Trungpa. I'm getting better at seeing all the ways in which my ego keeps me stuck or suffering. That's progress. 4. Family. My girls are 7 and 3. Home is asking for more of my attention than ever before. For years, I resisted this, and I know this is where my biggest growth lies. Life keeps showing me that my real curriculum right now is here. In the early mornings. In the kitchen. At bedtime. With my daughters and wife. In the small, ordinary moments I used to rush past or try to push away. In this season, I'm not compulsively reading stacks of books, listening to random podcasts, scrolling social media, or trying to keep up with what everyone else is consuming. The inputs have narrowed and that feels right. Coaching, family, Hakomi, dharma. Four things. That's enough. Maybe more than enough. Not sure how much I'll post here. But I wanted to say hello. And if you're in your own season of slowing down, simplifying, or trying to figure out what actually matters, I see you.

"You're not something that is a result of the big bang, on the end of the process. You are still the process. You are the big bang, the original force of the universe coming on as whoever you are. I know I'm that too." — Alan Watts

@sergey_kaplich Live in Ulster County where the Catskills and the Hudson River Valley meet. Sheer perfection. Mountains and country.

@schlaf How far upstate?

My biggest developmental leap happened when I left NYC and moved upstate into nature. It happened almost immediately. I don't think that was a coincidence. Nature connects us back to ourselves and to something larger in a way that cities can't.

@Rick42798550 I’m very close to Woodstock. Hallowed ground.

@schlaf That’s why Woodstock happened there. It’s able to digest the energy of the greatest city on earth but at a more palatable level.

@PianoAround Warmer pastures are nice. We had a brutal winter, but there’s something magical about being embedded in the four seasons.

@schlaf Just had the same thing happen to me. Had more time to breathe, slow down, and be in the sun. Not in upstate NY though. Prefer warmer pastures.

@fortelabs Pure awareness 💚

With Claude Code's help, I'm quickly running out of things to do on my to-do list I'm actually having to go into "someday/maybe" to find new things to give it, like feeding a hungry productivity beast Who will we become when we literally have nothing left on our to-do list?

@EmmettNaughton And touch grass

@schlaf I gotta go on more walks.

@DGartifact Paradoxically it was great for my development until a certain point and then it stunted it.

@schlaf moving to nyc was not good for my partigular psyche and had negative effects on development

@sandrafamilet 100% and it will continue to be especially with AI

@schlaf career change is basically a lifelong sport now.

For the first time in my career, I’m coaching professionals in their 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, and 70s. All at once. They’re all in different careers and chapters of life, but it’s a reminder that to be human is to move through transition.

@fsuzaki Hey @fsuzaki! Great to hear from you after all these years. Really appreciate the message!

@schlaf Hey @schlaf I’m really happy that you’re thriving in your career as a coach. I can still remember when you had just started and it is great to see you enjoying it 🚀

@SahilExec Print!

@schlaf Looks cool, is that a painting or print?

New addition for the office. This is going to hang next to my desk.

@dklineii Of course he didn't!

@schlaf Apparently Kerouac didn't have to write 20 performance reviews twice a year that 95% of people were disappointed by. I promise he'd remember if he had.

@MikeyPesto @pricefoulger I would love that. Had one of those delightful smash burgers at The Pines last night. Let’s make it happen.

@pricefoulger @schlaf Steve. We’re over due for a cold beer and a burger now that the weather is changing.

I can't stop thinking about local newsletters. A guy in Annapolis, Maryland started a free email newsletter about local events. No journalism background. He's an engineer. 23,000 subscribers. In a city of 40,000 people. ~$300,000 in revenue last year. From a newsletter about things to do in Annapolis. A 23-year-old in Winnipeg did $60,000 in his first two months of monetizing. @MikeyPesto , a guy in the Catskills did $32,100 last month. The model is stupid simple. Curate local events, restaurant openings, things to do. No politics. No crime. Just fun stuff for families. Send it once a week. Businesses pay to advertise because the open rates are 50-70%. The industry average is <20%. Subscriber acquisition cost? $0.50 to $1.00. Revenue per subscriber? $10-$12 per year. That's a 10-20x return. I don't know where else that ROI exists. Now here's why I'm stoked on this: I'm building a roofing company. Marketing in roofing is brutal. You're bidding against national brands on Google Ads with bottomless budgets. You're posting on social media where you don't own the audience and the algorithm can tank your reach overnight. So I'm going to start a local newsletter for my market. Build the audience. Build the trust. Then Rally Roofing advertises in its own newsletter. For free. To people who actually open the email. My marketing spend doesn't go to zero, it goes NEGATIVE. Other businesses pay me to run ads alongside mine. I wrote the whole breakdown in this week's issue of The Rally. [Link in first reply]

Related: as AI eventually gobbles up many finance and accounting jobs, I suspect this process of coming back to creativity and soul will be inevitable for these professionals.

Some of the most soulful and creative people I work with came out of finance. When they finally begin to wake up, all that energy that was contained comes flooding out. It’s a magical process to witness.

@jonnym1ller Brace yourself 😜

It's sort of a wild experience waiting in anticipation for your first child to be born. It feels like moving towards an event horizon, beyond which all we know is that our lives are about to be irrevocably changed ;)

@dthorson Love this so much. Very important topic these days. I’m glad you’re sharing this with the world.

My fiancée and I are both noticing something unexpected: the way we use AI is actually deepening our relationship and our friendships. Turns out when you get clear on what's yours to do and learn to stop when it's done, you end up more present — not less. We're teaching a course next month on how we got here. values.unfolding-life.com