Mark Peterson

@AGoldmund You sent me a LinkedIn connection request after I emailed Reply All about something, and I accepted it. I consider it one of the great honors of my lifetime

@AGoldmund Alex I think you unlocked the Twitter final boss with this one

@GuyFieri welcome to my beautiful town of Minneapolis! I know you’re busy but please DM me. I looked like you in 7th grade and my life has been a downward spiral ever since. I have wanted to meet you for 20 years. Have a great day #SuperBowl2018

It's 2015 and still, someone somewhere in the world still thinks unfrosted pop tarts are the best ones

Wasn't one of them named Redfoo? I wonder if he's working at an Office Max now or something

I just remembered that LMFAO existed

Ah snap you guys I just found out that Twitter is a thing again! In other news I am 96 years old

Filled up for $2.89 and then TODAY IT WAS $2.95 HAHAHA EVERYONE IS STUPID EXCEPT FOR ME

"It's actually about fishing, but leave it to the media to take it out of context." -Meghan Trainor on her hit song "All About That Bass"

The bar downtown is playing the entire Postal Service album. Everything is okay right now.

Anybody up for making a Harlem Shake video??????????

"That Miley Cyrus and that Justin Beaver. Why don't they just export them back to Canada?" Never change, grandma.

"Cilantro. Is that what the Mexicans like?" Never change, grandpa.

just took wayyyyy too many albums of DMB haha bout to start trippin here we go

The Red Cross woman who drew my blood went outside for a smoke. That's not how you health, lady

Just bought a rumchata jagermeister pineapple juice on the rocks. Called it the "Phyllis Diller." Weird how the bartender didn't know

Bout that time that the drunk guy at the party puts Ignition on

RT @BuzzFeed: Warm up to spring...by staying inside AND JUST DOING LIKE 4000 BUZZFEED QUIZZES WHICH DISNEY MOVIE ARE YOU FIND OUT. IMPORTANT

Listening to overzealous cosplayers define cosplay during class is like watching Da Vinci paint...in MS Paint

@chamillionaire haven't hit u up in a while. Dude whatcha up to??? Text me haha but for real RT ME